L A T T E R S T Y L E

a flower to hide

2012-02-01T09:03:00.000-06:00

(vintage jacket and skirt, venessa arizaga necklace, fever ray t-shirt from a stranger...read the story here)

I am having a paisley moment. I say moment, as if it's just a passing trend or a fleeting idea, but in truth I've always had a love for this delicate design. A story? At 19 I found myself living in a decayed wooden room with walls that sagged sadly, or shrugged?, asking me why I still lived there, why hadn't I moved on, what was I so afraid of? I knew the answer of course: I was afraid of being alone. In those days, I filled my (slowly) passing time with an abattoir of Catherine Wheel and collecting paisley-printed things from the thrift store. I can ruefully recall a most ravishing dress I'd found at Goodwill, ochre with hints of maroon, besotted with paisley, adorned with button down its length, buttons that ultimately became a cunning trap. But for the moment, wearing that dress made me feel okay. The simple paisley teardrops resembled my own tears and at that time, and I shed many of them. I felt some comfort in wearing my sadness. But ultimately to me, paisley represents a kind of quiet strength; stunted character upon defeat, whispery guard rather than retreat. And so, at 26, the skirt in some ways pays respect that dress that unintentionally helped me through a profoundly difficult time. Hindsight truly is 20/20.

goldenrod

2012-01-30T09:02:00.000-06:00

(blouse by/from risto, ebay'd horace sweater, thrifted skirt, alexander wang shoes)

Yesterday I dressed up as a sort of goth grandma, or in other words, what I envision my personal Advanced Style to be like one day. At 26 1/2 I still have my youth but every year it slips further from my grasp and time, vicious time, taunts me from dreams and photographs and piles of regrets. It's true that one musn't dwell upon those long-extinguished flames of the past but with each passing year I seem more unable to stop myself from doing so. Maybe it's a natural part of shedding youth. I suppose that one part of getting older is simply coming to terms with the end of halcyon days, but truthfully, my youth wasn't idyllic at all. Perhaps when I am much older I'll find that my most blissful moments are those taking place right now.

you need to give me more texture

2012-01-27T08:42:00.000-06:00

Sometimes fashion and fashion blogging and fashunthis and fashunthat gets all caught up in the name that's stamped on a label inside a neckline. Admittedly, I do this too (ugh h8 myself), but at least I am immediately grossed out with myself for even caring, and proceed to put on pajama pants and "borrow" one of my boyfriend's t-shirts. And by borrow I mean, of course, I wear it once and relegate it to the hellhole known as my hamper until boyfriend sadly wonders aloud where his favorite Ride t-shirt went.

So removing context and discovering the basis of a garment is a great way to fall in love with your pieces all over again. Prints and textures say so much about style and taste in a way that is regrettably overlooked. My style primarily tends towards black things in a rich texture that is eye-catching and romantic, while my prints are hazy shoegaze dreams. I find that I gravitate towards anything that is ethereal, which goes for fashion, music, art, literature, and so on.

What do your favorite prints and textures say about you?

puke-a-tronic

2012-01-25T09:15:00.000-06:00

(comme des garcons jacket, leggings and white button-down from the thrift store, givenchy glasses)

Last weekend I found myself scattered between a performance art performance involving transistor radios and capes made from CDs, and wearing a tulle headpiece amongst an apartment full of kitsch while I lip synced for my friends' music video . I really enjoy visiting the homes of others that resemble a Tchotchke's/Chili's/Flinger's, ie, campy shit all over the walls. Maybe it's because there's a kind of voyeuristic aspect to examining novel trinkets and bric-a-brac that I'm not used to seeing everyday, especially since when it comes to decorating my apartment, my worldly possessions could fit in the corner of a single room. Much of my late teens and twenties were nomadic, half by choice, half by escapist life necessity. But luckily these days I have stability enough to stay in one place! Life Achievement Unlocked.

I'm wearing my first CdG, a half-jacket I bought in NYC a couple weekends ago. I have a ton of styling ideas for this thing. Buying clothes from now on will be done so if the question "can I wear this with my half-jacket?" being answered the in the affirmative. Big black glasses and minimal makeup because I wanted to look decidedly not-sexy. And this vintage tulle headpiece, which I borrowed to film my portion of the music video. Yes, I'll post the video as soon as it is released! As long as you all promise to not make too much fun of me.

holygrapie

2012-01-23T22:31:00.000-06:00

So, I bought a fragrance? I've never worn a scent before so this is kind of a big deal for me? I haven't the foggiest notion of anything related to perfumes so to spare us all some posturing I won't even pretend to know anything about it. But I was at Comme des Garçons in NYC and idly sprayed this pink liquid onto my wrists. I was instantly transported back to my childhood visits to the botanica with my grandmother and the piles of herbs and resins and candles she'd bring home and set alight in our home as she prayed softly. Beautiful memories these are, and this fragrance, with it's notes of roses and frankincense and Catholica, gives me a most palpable sense of nostalgia in a very comforting way.

rave on

2012-01-20T08:29:00.000-06:00

(vintage bestey johnson coat, proenza schouler jeans, thrifted sweater)

So last night the old man and I went out on a date to the Music Box Theater where Jim DeRogatis was hosting a screening of 24 Hour Party People. It's one of my absolute favorite films because for 1.5 hours I can lose myself in a mad, Madchester world that exists only in dreams and legends and my romanticized longings. If I could go back into any point of musical history it would be undoubtedly be able to experience the ecstasy (literally) of a rave at the Hacienda. I would trade my youth in with no hesitation to have been born long enough ago to see Madchester in its heyday. New Order and the Stone Roses and the Factory Records experimental art project...how I wish I could have been a part of that. I don't even like the Happy Mondays!, but it's not about the music I think, it's about what it represented, it's about time when people were just genuinely fucking excited to see rock bands at a shitty club and they danced at shows and partied in a scene that was original and dynamic. There has been nothing like that since, from the Union Jack to the stars n' stripes because the DJ has commandeered peoples' dancing bodies. At risk of quoting The Smiths, the DJ says nothing to me about my life. And so I spend my days romanticizing a scene I wasn't born early enough to know. Though romanticization is kind of fun because I have this elaborate idea built up in my head of what the Hacienda was and real life always tragically falls short.

Anyway. I wanted to wear an outfit that felt sufficiently 90s and Madchester, and I think I accomplished it with the cropped turtleneck, Peter Saville-kinda pants and giant fake fur coat. English music scenes from the 80s and 90s (shoegaze, new wave, batcave, Britpop, Madchester, etc) occupy a very special place in my heart and my "personal identity" and have always been a major inspiring force for me.

"This isn't about me. I'm a minor player, in my own life story."

i wanna jump the walls and run

2012-01-19T08:00:00.002-06:00

(emma cook cape, preen dress, super old tights, venessa arizaga necklace, alexander wang shoes)

I wore this outfit literally every day while I was in NYC last weekend, but have been enjoying it so much that I decided to take some better photos of it. The inspiration here is Graveyard Girl, and not just the song by M83, but the archetype of spookiness and whimsy and loneliness and wide-eyed wonder. It takes the severity and coolness out of wearing black and tempers it with innocence and longing. I identified immediately with this song because it taps into some part of myself that isn’t cool, has never felt cool, and to be perfectly honest, doesn’t even understand this notion of coolness to begin with. M83’s song (the youtube video is HERE, should you wish to listen to it)
was rightfully lambasted on Hipster Runoff and I’ll be the first to admit that it’s obnoxiously cheesy, but sometimes cheesiness is okay! I like this archetype specifically because it’s a sophomoric idea of “goth”. The world is a fucking shameful place sometimes and being brought to smiles, even through a pastoral song or deer appliqués on a cape, can make each day worth feeling a part of.

Some screencaps from the music video, which includes sappy things like tombstones and roses.

You may notice that I am wearing flat shoes! This is a really big deal for me. I place myself firmly on the heels side of the debate because I am short but oddly I have big feet (we're talking a 9.5-40 situation) which is probably the worst combination for flats because I end up looking like I'm wearing clown shoes. Not sure if it was the constant pain my legs are in since I've been going to Bikram Yoga everyday, or Arabelle's enabling when we were at OAK, but I've finally invested in a pair of flats FOR GREAT JUSTICE.

I have never been much of a jewelry person, but this Venessa Arizaga necklace captivated me immediately. It’s an ethereal reverie and feels like something that was found in a ghost ship under the ocean. The perfect way to introduce a little dreampop into my everyday monochrome ensembles.

a weekend in NYC, in instagram because i am lazy

2012-01-16T10:03:00.000-06:00

Every time I visit NYC, my trip is always a whirlwind of cramming in time with friends and doing lots of walking and getting lost on the subway. Apparently Uptown really means Uptown and Downtown really means Downtown! The best part of the weekend, of course, are are the photos you won't see and the memories that I was too drunk to remember...

the only outfit i wore during my trip/untentionally britpop-themed bar that morgan i stumbled into, DO NOT remember taking this picture.

happy birthday arabelle!/yarn bomb

downstairs is A.OAK, at OAK/i bought flats?! wang, from OAK

waited 2.5 hours to get into death and company, SO WORTH IT/morgan meagan sara

this mexican place was a party/how cute is brodie's dress?!

space invader at cdg/street art at CdG, recognize the artists?/...hello first CdG.

cold girl

2012-01-14T10:57:00.000-06:00

In NYC for the long weekend. I've been really with some really intense real life personal things lately, so this trip will provide some much-needed relaxation! My camera battery died and OF COURSE I forgot to bring the charger so until I stop by B&H, this is what you get! Emma Cook cape (PUT A DEER ON IT AND CALL IT ART), Preen dress, Venessa Arizaga necklace that you can't see.

lanvinnnn laaaanvin you are my cameo queen, or distance versus time cutting verses down to size

2012-01-12T08:31:00.000-06:00

I haven't written any reviews or discussed much runway fashion lately, largely because the Spring/Summer 2012 season was tremendously...uninspiring. These days it takes something really substantial for me to draw my creative energies away from Internet Validation Of My Existence. And besides, aren't blogs supposed to be about "advertorials" and LOOK AT THIS THING I GOT FOR FREE and posts that don't even try to hide the fact that they are essentially copy? Am I breaking blog rules by writing about something that is designed in no way to put money in my pocket/further my internet fame capital/finesse relationships with brands and PR reps? Am I allowed to write about fashion on a fashion blog?!

Clearly I have a lot of pent-up feelings on the subject. But I also have feelings about Lanvin's Pre-fall 2012 collection! Good feelings, feelings of admiration for expressive design that captures two divergent aesthetics: Dancing Queen Roxy Music Ladytron, and obstinant neovictorian refineries. This is a woman who laces up her boots with the compulsion of hanging her clothes on fabric hangers (NEVER WIRE HANGERS) but lets her laces fall under a glittering disco ball and liquid courage. It's especially fascinating that dear old Elber Albaz decided to coalesce these two archetypes because so often, women are caged into one or the other. Party girl or bookworm. Social butterfly or hermit. Whore or virgin. In media and news and advertising and uh, life, it's these dicey boxes that us ladies get stuck in and see our counterparts get stuck in as well, to the detriment of being valued by society as, you know, A FULL COMPLETE PERSON. As human beings we are complex and multidimensional creatures with capacities for limitless interests and endeavors and all sorts of neat self-actualization. Lanvin's lady in this collection is so actualized that she goes to *~da partie~* in a cameo necklace and a true blue mancoat and elbow-length gloves. She's sexy on her own terms. She dances in long sleeves because she likes long sleeves but also likes to shake her bonbon. And thus, I term her the Cameo Queen.

Ladytron - Deep Blue

sunday eyes

2012-01-09T09:02:00.000-06:00

(falcon jacket by/from risto, siblings t-shirt sent to me by the band, thrifted leggings, doc martens boots)

My old man and I have a quaint little Sunday routine - wake up (at noon, usually...), nurse our hangovers, take our pup for a stroll around the block, and get breakfast at Atomix Cafe. It's quite cute, actually, and provides me with stability in an otherwise mad, mad world. As Nicolette so wisely once said, brunch is the most important meal of the day. As such, I like to throw on an ensemble that is just slightly above "I had too many drinks last night and consequently feel like death warmed over." A single statement piece is typically sufficient to mitigate the puffy eyes and vertiginous nausea. In yesterday's case, it's this Risto jacket, which, well, um, darting eyes, shuffling feet, was custom made for me. Thanks Risto. My new boots are SHOEGAZE SHOES (lol Morgan, no, they do not have one tooth). I have a weakness for anything iridescent because it so strongly reminds me of my favorite music. Reflecty rainbow kaleidoscopy things anchored with heavy black basics>>>never gonna stop.

for the love of the crowd and three cheers from everyone

2012-01-05T09:00:00.000-06:00

(carin wester dress, carven collar, hot topic necklace, miu miu shoes)

I've been revisiting some classic "goth" music lately. Albums like Disintegration by The Cure, Denali's self-titled debut record, and Mazzy Star's She Hangs Brightly. After being on a po-mo noise/avant-Gregorian chant revivalist bender (AKA, listening to a lot of No Not Fun releases...), the heartwarming songs that I credit as my introduction to music feel so appropriate right now. It also inspired this spooky throwback getup, to the quintessential days of "goth" as I imagine them to be. A giant pleated dress and giant pleated collar gives me a very homey/homely feeling that listening to The Cure also imbues within me.

But do not be fooled by the front of this asexual tent dress! It comes with a party in the back!

fearful symmetry

2012-01-02T08:16:00.000-06:00

(givenchy glasses, risto blouse)
New prescription eyecandy. They are severe and powerful and dominate my face, and imbue me with uncharacteristic boldness despite my natural inclination towards shyness. Best when worn with no makeup and a dreamy Risto blouse.

the year in photos, or something

2011-12-31T15:43:00.001-06:00

I don't really feel like writing some long treatise about my past year. Rough spots popped up, of course, but a whole it was quite enjoyable. Here are some previously unpublished photos from the year, presented entirely without context.

Best wishes and love in the new year. xoxo

luv goon

2011-12-29T09:00:00.000-06:00

(rodarte dress, vintage sequined topper, house of holland tights)

The old man and I celebrated four year of love last night. I wore my vintage seashell topper, which said old man described as "an elaborate tablecloth that I cut a hole in and stuck my head through", but that's just offensive to me. Because clearly, this is not an elaborate tablecloth, it is an oversized sequined doily that I cut a hole in and stuck my head through.

Forget about accordian pleats and Proenza satchels. Body doilies are the next big IT TREND FASHUN THING.

My House of Holland bandana tights and new Miu Miu shoes are fast becoming Horcruxes in my wardrobe. Spooky maximalism is where I'm at these days. The more the better, as long as it's black.

Oh! Also! I wrote stuff for Portable and Rookie. Perhaps you should read it, if you are so inclined.

how to bring a blush to the apartment

2011-12-22T01:20:00.002-06:00

(IAN R.N. dress, boyfriend's belt, random old tights, jil sander shoes from jane)

Bought this dress specifically because it reminds me so strongly of the cover and overall mood of Victorialand by the Cocteau Twins. The music is both organic and stark at the exact same time; full of flora but devoid of life. I really appreciate the dichotomous nature of those themes, and how perfectly the Cocteau Twins managed to combine them.

Jil Sander shoes that Jane was selling, whose hands I was delighted to take them off. Like Victorialand, it's the perfect combination of death and life. Shoes that one would construct from debris from the apocalypse.

Getting older means my body is changing again, in tangible ways, in intangible ways. I noticed my hairline was receding a few week ago and truth is, I wasn't upset about it, because growing up has its positives (like the fact that for the first time in my life, I don't feel like an explosive combination of emotions that are never really supposed to mix). I can't control what my body does but I didn't want to the world to stare at my bald spots, so now I have bangs to cover them up. They aren't perfectly straight. But there's beauty in imperfections.

The soundtrack of dreams.

all lies lead to the truth.

2011-12-21T09:00:00.000-06:00

No other pop culture icon has inserted its way into my aesthetic reveries the way The X-Files has. I began watching the show as a preteen and quickly evolved into an ardent x-phile, obsessing over minutia like Cigarette Smoking Man's evil glaces and Mulder and Scully's blistering sexual tension (SHIPPER4EVER). The show's brilliant mytharc featured some of the strongest storytelling and character development on television ever. Layers upon layers of parascientific ~*mysteries*~ made the show brainfood for the discriminating nerd. I recall many classes in the eighth grade in which I spent daydreaming about the week's episode and scrawling notes and webs in order to make sense of its place in the mytharc. Ahem. Clearly you can see why I had no friends.

The X-Files was spooky, in every single sense of the word. The brief glimpses into Mulder and Scully's personal lives were always bathed in darkess (literally and figuratively), because these were characters who lived and breathed their work in the paranormal to their own eventual detriment. Themes of paranoia, distrust, and esoterica appealed to me the most, as did the show's stark and shadowy art direction. My blog's header? Yep, it's from the title screen. Because my social life has not progressed from my aforementioned eighth grader loserdom, in my spare time I collect screencaps of my favorite X-Files moments while I watch it on Netflix. Yes, the WHOLE SERIES is available on Netflix Instant. So for those of you who've never watched it before, get on it!

("One Breath", season 3)

("All Souls", season 5)

("Die Hand Die Verletztz", season 2)

("Dreamland II", season 6)

("Eve", season 1)

("Je Souhaite", season 7)

("Kitsunegari", season 5)

("The Postmodern Prometheus", season 5)

("The End", Season 5)

("The Field Where I Died", season 4)

("Triangle", season 6)

la eau d' italiancais

2011-12-19T08:45:00.000-06:00

(rodarte for opening ceremony blouse and leather apron, thrifted leggings, ebay'd ann demeulemeester boots, rosary necklace from hot topic from when i was 16)
Kind of melding a lot of influences in my outfit from yesterday; leather fetish, old lady prints, witch boots, religiousness, undone hair that I hate (more on that later). The print on this blouse is so sublime that I could stare at it for days. It's a tiled Art Nouveau drawing that includes roses and ghostly faces and oil lamps. Exactly the kind of esoteric thing that could only come from the mind of the Mulleavy sisters.

I also got to wear my real-life priest coat today. It's one of my favorite thrift store finds and it's so strongly referential that I have to be in a serious Good Catholic Girl mood to wear it. Also, I'm a big believer in voluminous, body-consuming outerwear. Hide your shape and allow your coats to swallow your figure! Don't belt that coat, don't cinch that waist. Because strolling around a winter wonderland in a bloblike coat is quite a liberating feeling, I promise you.

The buttons on this coat! Crosses in the middle! See what I mean about it being so strongly referential? Also, I cannot believe this necklace is 10 years old...it's seen me throughout all of my various goth incarnations, from nu-metal mall goth to romantic neovictorian to annoying fashiongoth, to today, which is a blending of all my finest/lamest goth moments. Classics from Hot Topic never die.

I HAD THE TITULAR TIGHTS

2011-12-16T09:59:00.000-06:00

Awww guys, thanks for the positive feedback on my previous post! Beauty pageant wave. You're too kind. As my inspiring BFF Annie always tells me, the personal is political. For me that means that style and fashion is always political!

(rodarte for opening ceremony dress, house of holland tights, dries van noten shoes, vintage fuzzy sweater)

Today, however, I am displaying an outfit I wore to a house party in Logan Square a couple week ago. I don't even remember the last time I went to house party, which either makes me sophisticated~ or pathetic, depending on how you look at it. Oh, there was karaoke at this party. My boyfriend and I sand "What Have I Done To Deserve This" by the Pet Shop Boys, which is indeed a magickal song. You're singing the song in your head now, aren't you? See?! MAGICK!

But by far the most important part of this outfit are these tights. They are ladders. My blog is called LATTERSTYLE (caps are my personal brand). Which means these tights are Titular Tights. TITULAR TIGHTS! Do you REALIZE what a major advancement this is in the field of hosiery?! "Oh boy, I'm just so tired of all these ladder-style tights..."

(rodarte x opening ceremony leather blazer, mandy coon bag, american apparel scarf)

And because I'm all about the practicality, here's how I layered up for the journey to the el station. Real Klassy Ladies like myself wear destroyed fake leather boots for the 5-block walk and carry Dries shoes in their hands. Emulate my Park Avenue cool. Become absorbed in my Gold Coast chic. I am High Fucking Society.

psalms of survival

2011-12-14T08:45:00.000-06:00

(zara coat, vintage fuzzy sweater, risto city lights blouse, screen vinyl image button)

Bowery Electric - Lushlife

This theme of melancholic urban winters has been a recurring one through my young adult years, especially living through those in the Midwest, which are grey and cold on a scale of which are completely alien to outsiders. Perhaps you'd have to be from here to understand.

I remember when its desolation struck me for the very first time. I was a tadpole 20-year old who'd worked up the courage to move out of the wooden townhouse I shared with my ex (though as survivors all know, the first breakup is never the last). Battered but not bloodied, I carted my meager possessions into a traincar apartment that overlooked dumpsters and their vulturous flies. There was a perpetually darkened bedroom that I never used, because it was drafty and lonely and riddled with nothingness. Space heaters were strewn about the place because a gas bill was out of the question; sweaters never helped; I was always so. so. cold. My mattress held me in the modest living room because somehow, the (donated) television and (donated) Xbox sitting beside it made me feel more human. Human enough to sleep, at least, though I soon discovered that sleep would escape me too.

Those were days of desperate peanut butter sandwiches and malicious pineapples stuck inside my mixte's brakes. Poetic Ramen noodles and deeply paranoid bagels, spoiled milk and High Five french fries. And at night, when the snow fell and collected into tiny untouchable mounds outside my window, I heard my thoughts as clearly as a friend speaking them to me, right in front me, but perhaps more accurately inside me. Monologues in which I convinced myself that I was "alright", that I didn't love him anymore, that the blue body pillow I slept with each night was a perfectly able substitute for his arms. It wasn't, of course, but one can convince themselves of many things if they say it long enough.

Those were hungry days. I mean that in all of its variants. I craved many things, my stomach craved more, my heart craved it all. And everyday was a struggle in supplying my body's various demands. Dreams/nightmares were present in my waking hours, zombie Meagan strolled throughout bookstores and boutiques with no purpose other than to try (futilely) to connect to the sprawling metropolis around me. Have you ever felt as though your corporeal self was a vessel that you did not control? That life was some sort of picture book that you were gazing at from a different dimension? Try as I might, I was simply an automaton. It took a long time before the human feelings that had been beat out of me returned to a proper place.

That was all perhaps very abstract, but the words make sense to me. This post is a testament to the ability of a garment to act as a time travel device. This city lights shirt, by virtue of its associative design, takes me right back to the coldest days I've ever known. Were it up to me I'd squash that experience deep, deep down (where it belongs?) but at some point, one needs to open one's eyes to Hard Things. I'm thankful that this simple button-down can help me to start to process mine.

house of matching colours is treasure, basically

2011-12-06T22:31:00.001-06:00

My ideal noncasual wardrobe would consist entirely of clothes that feel as though they exist only in some astral plane. The dreamier, the better - in essence, clothes so surreal they may not be of this world, but still somewhat grounded with a slight bit of reality. Lately I've become consumed by romanticism and desires to embody a Cocteau Twins song in my outfits. Dressing like dreampop means becoming a cloud princess not unlike the cover of Treasure...

House of Matching Colours by Paula Selby Avellaneda is my prized fashion discovery of 2011. After stumbling into Opening Ceremony during NYFW in September, I tried on a couple of the exquisite tulle dresses and they've been stuck in my consciousness ever since. These dresses transform you into an esoteric fae from mystickal planes and those are very good feelings. I JUST WANT TO FEEL ETHEREAL, ALRIGHT? Enjoy some eyecandy and swoon over these painfully sumptuous gowns...

Images via Opening Ceremony and House of Matching Colours' website

This dress, appropriately called The Birthday Dress because come on! it looks like a birthday cake! is hands down the most beautiful thing in my closet. This iPhone picture does it absolutely zero justice.

i dish it out but i can't take it either

2011-12-05T09:02:00.000-06:00

So I went to NYC last Thursday, just for day...and got to shop at the Rodarte sample sale while I was there. I have to say, it was ~~slightly~~ more than slightly overwhelming to be surrounded by so much Rodarte! Racks of meticulously crafted dresses that may as well exist in dreams and a bay window covered in Spring 2011 gold vase wedges. The staff was super friendly and not pretentious at all. Needless to say, I took serious advantage of the rock-bottom prices and scored some mindblowing deals on ethereal black things.

If for some reason you are actually interested in what I purchased, I made this little materialistic video where I turn into a complete banal cliche' of everything I hate about fashion and say "really really" and "weird" a lot. Forgive me! Oh well, it's time like this when Lush's "Hypocrite" feels especially applicable.

teardrops on my pillow

2011-11-23T15:49:00.000-06:00

Rock hasn't been kind to music that is unabashedly girly; at best, all-female bands are sequestered into the vapid made-up genre of "girl bands" (PLEASE read this Pitchfork article!), at worst, they are fetishized and endure all sorts of vile harassment (a fact made all too clear the last time I saw Austra - some bro pushed me out of the way and declared loudly to his buddy, "OH MAN, SHE'S SO FUCKING HOT!"). For lack of better words, The Dum Dum Girls seem to not give a fuck! This is band that owns their femininity, takes active joy in conventional girliness, and doesn't apologize for it. And perhaps most importantly, their music does not suffer for it.

There's a very tangible sense of longing that pervades their new album Only In Dreams; the feeling of grasping at something forever out of reach, that proverbial dangling carrot feeling. In DeeDee's case, this album was written while she dealt with the death of her mother (who, incidentally, is the woman on the cover of I Will Be) and her heartache is both wrenching and endearing. The titular "Wasted Away" actually made me misty as I listened to the lyrics that spoke so honestly of loss: "I'd rather waste away than see you only in dreams." As someone who's luckily never experienced the death of someone close, I can't relate at all to DeeDee's words but she makes me feel them as strongly as she does. "In My Head" features her desperately just wanting to be adored, something even Ian Brown couldn't even accomplish, though that universal human desire is buried deep in all of us. As in life, there's no eventual resolution to DeeDee's sense of yearning but this album leaves you smiling from its bubblegum pop sensibilities nonetheless.

Anyway, the vinyl edition of this album brings all of the music's moods into distinctly beautiful physicality. Ghosts, roses, and lace are a hint of the album's loss themes. But it's the pink marbled vinyl itself that struck me immediately, I mean, look at how gorgeous it is! It's easily the most beautiful piece of vinyl in my collection and I will treasure it every time it gets spun on my record player.

i want to be dependable, courageous, and good.

2011-11-18T08:59:00.000-06:00

Some really special things have entered my life recently. I'm currently in the middle of redefining my whole aesthetic and it feels so good to have finally figured out how I want to dress. It's like a style switch clicked on in my brain! I'll have to write about it later, but for now, enjoy some eye candy.

Dries van Noten shoes from last season. A flash of rainbow caught my eye as I wandered through the miasma of shoes at Nordstrom Rack, and my heart skipped a beat when I saw these steeply discounted shoes in exactly my size. The heels and ankle straps collect light and refract it into an ocean of brilliant colors that change with every step I take. They are space-age, they are ethereal, and I'm in love.

Risto lightning skirt from his Spring 2010 collection. A lucky score on eBay, though it fits a little snug. I've gained some weight over the past year and truthfully I'm not insecure about it, but it does present some challenges when I can't predict my size anymore. Body politics are so sensitive and loaded with personal feelings, but it's important to talk honestly about these issues if we're ever to resolve them.

Zara button-down which I'm sure will be on every style blog in the coming weeks, but it's easy to see why! This blouse is an explosion of flowers and is precisely the kind of thing to wear when you're having a bad day. You can't be too upset when you're basically wearing the Secret Garden.

My latest haul from Quimby's. I haven't finished reading Persepolis (a recommendation from my wonderful BFF), but it's shaping up to be one of my favorite books of all time. Well, actually it's a graphic novel, but its powerful storytelling transcends any literary medium. And the new Encens is a restrospective of Japanese fashion designers like Junya, Rei, and Jun and is basically one of the most glorious things ever. Highly required for any fans of wabi-sabi and drop crotch pants!

last chance for romance

2011-11-16T08:30:00.000-06:00

(meadham kirchhoff for topshop dress (ebay), rodarte for opening ceremony cardigan, zana bayne harness, old shredded tights, even older UO boots)

Wow, I look completely asleep in this photo, which is surprisingly because this photo was taken on the one day when I was actually "running errands" and "taking care of business". In fact, I was so awake that I decided to wear my sparkliest dress around Wicker Park. It's an impeccable study of melting sequins and decaying hemlines and nonchalant sheerness; this dress looks like the zombie corpse of a disco ball. It attracts stares and glances like nothing else in my closet. Indeed, it's a prime example of how getting dressed each day is my biggest weapon against my social anxiety - when my outfit makes me happy, I can't help but shrug off any awkward looks I receive on the street. This is me, and I'm not apologizing for it anymore!

In my opinion this dress is best worn with my Rodarte for Opening Ceremony carpet cardigan and boots that are too old to function as boots...

Detailing so exquisite it could make you cry.

Thanks to everyone who entered the Lula magazine giveaway! The winner is Stephanie Marie, congratulations! You all are so precious, I wish everyone could have won.

shimmer

2011-11-14T09:30:00.000-06:00

(american apparel sheer mesh longsleeve, CHREE dress gift from christine rhee, ann demeulemeester boots, red leather pendant gift from zana)

Wore this last week to Shimmer, which is a monthly shoegaze night at Late Bar hosted by the always-inspiring Scary Lady Sarah. Usually I wear something ultra dreamy to Shimmer but the urge hit me to wear something a bit more Puritan. This outfit would be SO perfect with the white scalloped Louis Vuitton collar that I've been dreaming of...

Ahhh - The Stargazer Lilies

Scary Lady Sarah and Philly Peroxide always manage to dig up the most obscure shoegaze bands and expose them to a wider audience at this party. At Shimmer I always hear a song by an artist I've never heard of before and this time it was The Stargazer Lilies. Their brand of shoegaze is decidedly among the more disorienting, spacey variety...music for astral projections and swimming through poppy fields. RIYL All Natural Lemon & Lime Flavors or SIANspheric.

Pretty sure I need to start taking style cues from Shimmer's decorations...

Late Bar's projector is perfect for shoegazey self-portraits. I JUST WANT TO FEEL ETHEREAL.

(to stand in the shadow of your heart)

2011-11-09T08:56:00.000-06:00

(thrifted dolce & gabbana jacket, rodarte x opening ceremony cardigan, john's a place to bury strangers t-shirt, risto leggings, ebay'd ann demeulemeester boots. THIS MAH SRS FACE)

Oh hey guys, let's check out the righteous spot on my lens! I was far too lazy/busy/unconcerned to retake these photos, so imperfection will have to suffice for today. Deal with it. As the Earth's axis causes the seasons to change, I've been wearing variations on this outfit for my more casual days. I love how wearing a jacket over my Rodarte x Opening Ceremony cardigan makes it look like I'm wearing some kind of 70s shag carpet around my neck.

Noise rock band t-shirt + dust on my lens is SO FASHIN, U GUYZ.

Behind me you may notice our Loveless mini-shrine. Last week was the 20th anniversary of My Bloody Valentine's Loveless, so perhaps this an appropriate moment to show it off. As Stereogum noted, Loveless is largely "responsible for the warped nature of a large chunk of your record collection". It's so rare that music comes along that sounds as monumentally transcendental today as it did when it first released; nothing sounds like Loveless though many bands have tried. It's brilliance is perhaps best felt in its widespread legacy, nowadays it is nearly impossible to listen to guitar rock without noting at least some influence from this seminal album.

Our Lady of Guadalupe candle, John's Fender Princeton reverb amp (which he bought from some dude for next nothing, but apparently it's a Storage Wars "wow factor" situation!?), Loveless on vinyl, 33 1/3 Loveless mini-book, Julie West and Kidrobot Dunny (series 4) vinyl toys, Tremolo EP, Gloomy Bear vinyl toy, MBV ticket stub from the 2008 reunion tour.

It's far too easy to say that this was the best show I've ever been to. This was a fully sensory experience that can only be understood if one was there, caught up in the moment, bathed in sonorous waves of sound that bounced off the glittering nighttime sky of the Aragon. Kevin Shields' guitars just completely enveloped me and took me to a place not of this world - indeed, to see My Bloody Valentine live is to escape the planet Earth for an hour. I'd always lamented being born too late to have seen my favorite shoegaze bands in their heyday, but being able to catch their reunion tour is one of my most treasured life experiences.

giveaway! lula #13!

2011-11-07T08:58:00.001-06:00

Most of the time, I feel like this blog is silly and pointless and am constantly in awe that people actually read it. As a way to say thanks, I'm having a giveaway for Lula #13! I've waxed poetic about Lula before but really, if you aren't familiar with her, I do strongly advise entering the giveaway. This is the current Fall/Winter 2011 issue of Lula and features lots of Miu Miu and Kate Moss. As always, my giveaways do not require any obligation of any kind of your part. Simply comment with a valid email address and I'll choose a winner at random on November 16th!

This magazine was purchased from Quimby's Books here in Chicago, so your magazine comes from a local indepedent bookstore. Good luck!

"i challenge you to a slow smile contest"

2011-11-04T09:25:00.000-05:00

I know what you’re thinking. I can see it on your faces, from across the Internet.

“MEAGAN IS IN A PLACE THAT IS NOT HER APARTMENT?!”
I know, I’m pretty alarmed too.
But really! Sometimes I leave my house! These days I spend my few passing social moments at Late Bar, but a couple nights ago I actually emerged from my cave to go to a mixer at Tribute (is that right? “Networking event”? “Get-to-know party”? Fuck, I’m so clueless about these things) sponsored by the Chicago Blogger Network, which I’m sure you’ll be hearing more about soon. Tyler was gracious enough to take these charming Wednesdday Addams photos of me as proof that I did, in fact, vacate my couch long enough to socialize with other human beings. But I certainly made it home in time to catch the premiere of “The Fabric of the Cosmos”, which gave me a nerd boner pants tent.

(rodarte x opening ceremony jacket and dress, theory faux fur collar from ebay, chloe sevigny x opening ceremony paisley tights, rodarte shoes)

Channeling Herman Cain's SLOOOOOOW SMILE.

season of illusions, season of the witch

2011-10-26T09:00:00.000-05:00

(proenza schouler dress from filene's)

I received an email the other day from a reader, inquiring why I don't write about feminism on my blog as much as I used to. That email has been sitting unanswered in my inbox for about a week.

It's a fair question, I guess. This is a feminist fashion blog. And the reader is right - I haven't been talking about feminist issues as much as I used to.

I went through a series of mixed feelings after reading it. Anger, that someone would dare tell me how to write in my own blog. Embarrassment, at being called out for being a "bad feminist". Annoyance, because, hello!, I spend 40+ hours each week working for a social service helping to house low-income families affordably but apparently that doesn't matter because that fact isn't splashed plainly across my outfit posts.

Finally, the truth became crystal clear the longer I considered it. I'm SAD (or maybe not even SAD, just actually sad?) and sometimes, being SAD means that the world around you feels less colorful. You've got less energy to devote to the things that make up your impossibly complex personality, no interest in fulfilling your heart, no desire to challenge the status quo because at the end of the day, taking a nap on the couch seems like the only thing you can reasonably handle. I've been napping a lot.

But last week, I dragged myself out of the house to go to Season of the Witch. It's a private womens-only event at Late Bar that focuses exclusively on community-building by raising women's self-esteem. There's no traditional activist component. Just women sharing their trials and tribulations in a safe space with frank discussions of relationships, women's health, professional inspiration, femininity, and hugs over tears. It was an eye-opening experience because I realized something so painfully apparent but something that the Feminist Tumblr/Twitter Oppression Olympics Community sees to forget: activism comes in many different forms. There are so many ways to be a feminist, methods that aren't limited to reblogging/retweeting the latest Outrage Porn Thing viralling all over the internet. I mean, let's be honest. Those types of things are important for educating people about the truly fucked-up shit that goes in this world. But at the end of day, it doesn't give comfort to women who are in pain. It stokes our anger but maybe doesn't inspire our love and compassion.

It's difficult to muster up the strength to rant against something when I am completely helpless to fix it. Sometimes I have that strength; right now I don't and that's totally okay because I'm an imperfect human being, just as we all are, and strength wears through us all at some point. So I think right now, while I annually struggle with SAD, I'd like to focus on positive feminism that lifts women up. Practical enduring comfort, in the real world, for real women. So while it may not look like I'm angrily feminsting on my blog, do not fear!, I'll be doing it in my real life.

xoJane.com had this perfect quote that I'm going to share.

"Women are not perfect. Even feminists live in the real world, and sometimes feel bad about our bodies or make irresponsible choices. We are products of the same society we may not always agree with."

Let's attack that society first, one woman at a time, through positive communities and strong feminist outreach. Let's come at one another from a place of love. <3

Note: This was written, of course, from the perspective of a passably-white heterosexual abled employed cisfemale. I recognize that my privilege allows me to feel this way. Take that into consideration if you will.

dress-up in zana bayne

2011-10-24T13:42:00.001-05:00

Those of you that read this blog often (it STILL weirds me out that people actually read this thing! whut) know that I'm huge fan Zana Bayne's harnesses. It's a great way to reference sexuality in my outfits without necessarily dressing ~SeXXiE*~. I've never really been one for revealing clothes, but human sexuality is one of my interests so it's natural that I'd like to display that in what I wear!

While I was in NYC, I stopped by Zana's Brooklyn studio for a quick visit to check out her new collection. Immediately upon entering her studio, I was blasted by the scent of leather. The smell is deliriously intoxicating but she mentioned that she doesn't even notice the scent anymore! After congratulating her for the work she did with Prabal Gurung's spring/summer 2011 collection, I set about to try on some pieces from her new collection.

You're getting treated to iPhone photos because I thought I lost my camera at the Standard Hotel the night before. Luckily I found it piled under my clothes at my aunt's house in Queens...

The Arrow Harness. Impossibly intricate and delicate, but it feels very substantial and masculine when worn.

Um, say hi to my boobs? This is the Cruxus Harness in special red leather. The collar is detachable which is pretty important because this is the kind of harness that can be under a more revealing garment, like a low-cut top or backless dress. Definitely the most tradtionally S&M piece of the bunch (did you hear that, Morgan?)

The Totem Harness in patent leather. Definitely my favorite piece of the new collection, for its resemblence to an old-timey vampire ascot. Lestat would have wept at this harness. It just begs for a collared button-down, which luckily are plentiful in my closet! The waist belt can also be unclipped so the harness becomes a long necklace. Versatility is so important "in these challenging economic times".

The Snake Harness. A fabulous alternative to a wait belt, this piece would look incredible layered over a diaphanous dress to give it poise and structure. Personally, I love wearing it with seperates because that's just the kind of girl I am! But it's worth noting that Zana's harness are designed equally well when worn with a skirt, as the length is adjustable to the skirt's waistband, which you can see here. Crucial details, ya'll.

You can purchase Zana's pieces HERE. Also I'm wearing an AA sheer mesh button down, Alexander Wang bra, and $5 leather pencil skirt from THE BEST Salvation Army in Chicago. No, I will not tell you where it is.

"you're doing the blogger pose. all of you stand like that."

2011-10-17T09:32:00.000-05:00

So I was invited to this event at Barney's (yes, we actually have one in Chicago), lured in by the promise of free champagne. It was a signing to launch the new book The Eye Has to Travel by Lisa Immordino Vreeland, whose book chronicles the iconic career of Diana Vreeland. I really admire strong women who have a distinct point of view in their creative work, so this was really exciting! I certainly advocate for any event in which inspiring women's professional work is celebrated.

I also met Simon Doonan! Platonic love is real, I promise you, because I fell head first into it when he realized how down to earth he is. He joked that I was doing the "fashion blogger pose", or Standing With My Head Awkwardly Cocked And Shoulders Hunched Into My Temples. I probably blushed and explained it's because most fashion bloggers struggle to wear high heels in public, but really, we all know it's because we are socially awkward creatures who are terrified of humanity. WHICH IS WHY WE BLOG IN THE FIRST PLACE. Ha. It's funny because it's true.

Lisa Immordino Vreeland signing copies of her book.

Simon Doonan!

Couldn't resist sneaking a photo of these incredible Mary Katrantzou scarves...

photo courtesy of a mailbox on chicago avenue and self-timer!!! CREDIT PROPERLY OR THE MAILBOX WILL BE PISSED

...and here's my outfit. Kept it pretty casual. Topshop sweater, thrifted sheer blouse and bag, Proenza x J Brand jeans (ebay), Alexander Wang boots (ebay), Eleven Objects bracelets gifted by the brand. I never wear bracelets ("arm party"?...uh, no) but these are the only ones you'll ever see on my wrists.

I'd been looking through thrift stores for ages for a sweater like this, but came up empty every time! You'd think that Goodwill would have a gazillion black nubby cropped sweaters like this but surprisingly, I never found a single one that I liked. Finally I had to bite the bullet and get this one from Topshop. I love the texture variance and ribbed neckline, and it has pockets!!!! My buttons, which you can't see too well are from the SlutWalk and Depeche Mode's Music for the Masses.

2011-10-09T02:26:00.002-05:00

UMMMMM...

(image via risto's blog)

JUST SAYIN'...

when the sun hits

2011-10-03T13:42:00.001-05:00

I felt extremely humbled to receive this beautiful dress as a gift from Christine Rhee of Eleven Objects. She called it the Slowdive dress, so perhaps this dress and I were always meant to exist together on the same cosmic plane. In celebration of this wonderful gift, I decided to do something a little different with this outfit post.

Slowdive - When The Sun Hits

Slowdive's music (like this dress) speaks softly and doesn't scream. It doesn't have to. Their technical precision was best understood with a degree of subtlety that most shoegaze bands often eschewed in favor of a certain brashness. You could never discern their intricacies if they played with a sort of punk influence the way that My Bloody Valentine did. Details like soaring vocal harmonies, deeply personal lyrics, and three guitars bathed in so much reverb it sounds as though they recorded in a cathedral. Their music is beautiful in every sense of the word - you can't listen to the chorus in "When the Sun Hits" and not stop what you're doing to allow your mind to travel someplace else.

eleven objects all over my neck

2011-09-30T12:42:00.000-05:00

One of the highlights of New York Fashion week was a studio visit with Eleven Objects, a luxury accessories line designed with Christine Rhee and LT Do. We had been twittering back and forth for a while, primarily due to my clinical collar fetish and their love of shoegaze so you know, match made in heaven and stuff. I got to ogle their outstanding collars from their new spring collection and try some on so you all can see how they look IRL (and uh, not gonna lie, I totally wanted to dress up in them).

You never realize how much you use your neck each day until you're made keenly aware it! Luckily these collars are meant to withstand some abuse. The collars look so delicate, yet in the hands they feel weighty and durable. The craftsmanship is incredible, though I'm not sure how they'd hold up against a passionate makeout sesh.

I was greeted by a plate spangled with savories - Christine and LT know the way to my heart.

The spring collection was inspired by a Cope Cod beach and other assorted sandy places. Embellishments included seashells, coral, crystals, and studs.

Do try to ignore my unflattering poses in these photos. I had been going to shows all day and I had serious Afternoonface. This collar was my favorite because even though the red coral is obviously very beachy, from afar it looks like dripping blood and that heavily appeals to my spooky side. The collar of a ~*vampire's kiss*~.

This collar looks like glittering sand around your neck! Good things, my friend, all good things.

Pinstripes n' crystals n' wood, for when life requires serious collar action to get you through you day.

I liked this one a lot too! Not my ordinary color scheme, but the teal looks so good against black and imagining this collar against a lacy black shirt gives me goosebumps.

Now on to the spiked collars! My eyebrow glasses and this leather tan piece looked so good together that I cried inside when I had to take it off.

Durable silk that holds its shape even with the weight of the studs...

...and also super luxurious calf hair.

This collar should really be in every single issue of Lula Magazine.

And introducing collarsleeves, their newest objective endeavor! Are are you wearing a sleeveless top and feel just too...sleeveless? Are you wearing just a plain old t-shirt and feel that it could be vastly improved with raglan sleeves? Are you the kind of person who's always wished your sleeves and collar were somehow...different from the rest of your shirt? Collarsleeves are for you. Collarsleeves are for everyone. Collarsleeves are the future, and the future is now.

say three hails marys, turn around, pray about it

2011-09-27T21:09:00.000-05:00

One of my biggest aesthetic inspirations comes directly from my own childhood. I grew up Catholic and a deep appreciation the beauty of Catholicism has always remained with me, even if my faith in its doctrines have long since subsided. I've always admired the way Catholicism inspires such passion and the fervor with which believers create atmospheres of holiness. For Catholics, celebrating the beauty of our religion is the ultimate physical realization of our faith.

While I don't agree with reappropriating religious symbols for uh, trendy purposes (like this for example), I do believe that inspiration comes from all places. The mysticism, sanctity, and reverance of Catholic icons and imagery is something that everyone can appreciate.

I stopped into St. Patrick's Cathedral while sightseeing on 5th Avenue in New York, and took some photos. A bit of humility was exactly what I needed during Fashion Week. I sincerely you'll appreciate its beauty as much as I do.

risto bimbiloski spring/summer 2012 RIGHT HERE

2011-09-22T11:30:00.000-05:00

I had a couple sads when I learned that Risto would not be presenting at New York Fashion Week. He was the one designer I had my little heart set on seeing the most. When I wear Risto, I feel like his clothes are the most easily indentifiable representation of who I am; in essence, wearing his clothes makes me feel the most like myself. It's utterly ridiculous to find myself with such voracious Comme-level devotion to a designer, but Risto really does have this startlingly creepy ability to design clothes that so perfectly capture my personality.

Anyway. I was sent over the lookbook for his new Spring/Summer 2012 collection and I am delighted to share it with you all today! There's whimsy, there's classic pieces, there's his signature exquisite knitwear, but most importantly (for me!), there's spooky feathers and ethereal peach-colored abstract prints. That long sheer feather dress in look #22? Um, NEED IT. Oh yes, it will be mine.

last outfit post from fashion week I SWEAR

2011-09-19T10:00:00.000-05:00

(mandy coon leather top, henrik vibskov scarf worn as a skirt, rodarte x oc jacket, rodarte x kirkwood shoes, thrifted bag. photos via)

Wearing these shoes at Lincoln Center was like moths on a flame, in the most obnoxious way possible. Photographers wouldn't let me walk 5 five feet without stopping me to photograph them. I won't lie - it was a bit of an ego boost, and I'm the type of person who could always use those kinds of things in moderation to help myself through the self-loathing times. One of the hardest parts of my teens and twenties has been my struggle to accept myself the way I am. As women, we're taught to scrutinize every single aspect of our bodies and ourselves and amplify the (perceived) negatives and ignore the positives. And while I haven't successfully been able to celebrate my positives, I've at least come to terms with my (perceived) negatives. Trust me when I say that I've come a long way.

and now for something completely different...

2011-09-16T11:00:00.000-05:00

After the serious business of Fashion Week, here's something that will hopefully make you laugh. Feel free to laugh at me as well as with me!

"it's a skin condition."

2011-09-14T09:35:00.002-05:00

(rodarte x opening ceremony cardigan, horace sweater, austra t-shirt, risto leggings, gareth pugh shoes. photo by amy)

I'm going home today! Good lord, I am SO READY for my puppy and my own bed. I look awake because this photo was taken on day 1 of Fashion Week, which feels like so long ago that it may as well be its own epoch of my life. BFW (before Fashion Week) and AFW (after Fashion Week) will be the new guides of references for my twenties. Pathetic, yes? Anyway, these moon leggings are my ~new favorite thing~ and I think it's funny how they make me legs look like I have alien legs. It reminds me a lot of the pilot episode of Invader Zim where Zim is trying to pass for a human in his new classroom, but Dib is pointing out all of his alieneqsue features and Zim responds simply with "it's a skin condition." Kind of a great metaphor for how I feel about fashion blogging in general! Don't understand the reference?! Watch here (start at 8:08)!

gauntlet

2011-09-12T12:00:00.000-05:00

Just a super quick post before I head out! Arabelle and I ran into each other outside Lincoln Center and hammed it up for our respective cameras. Don't we look like goth princesses? That's kind of the only way I want to dress nowadays.

Arabelle is wearing the Comme jacket that I gave her and it was probably meant to be hers forever. We are also both wearing Zana Bayne harnesses. I'm wearing way too many collabs: Rodarte x Target dress, Chole Sevigny x Opening Ceremony paisley tights, Rodarte x Kirkwood shoes, and Mandy Coon leather top that got wrinkled in the rain that we had earlier that day. Tissue-thin leather and water are not friends.

kaelen spring/summer 2k12

2011-09-11T18:05:00.001-05:00

As I feel my style changing into something that I'm not sure I even understand, I'm constantly on the lookout for new designers that help me to understand where my brain is nowadays. Kaelen was a really great example of where my taste seems to be heading - ethereal, whimsical, slightly otherworldly, moderate femininity. The Rorschach ink blot prints were my favorite part of collection, along with the macrame gowns, micro pleats (GIVE ME ALL OF THE PLEATS PLZ), and pretty sparkling champagne colors.

miu miu all over ourselves

2011-09-10T11:05:00.001-05:00

I participated in Fashion's Night Out because it meant that I could see some friends, and this whole trip is essentially worthless without seeing friends. Dana, who is my wife, is a long time friend from indiefucks (lolol) and chifg (more lulz) and Chicago and she has my heart forever and I was so thrilled to see her. We went to Miu Miu to see Tavi since she was hosting the event and another familiar Chicago face is exactly what I needed. Nicolette showed up and we finally met after months of being e-friends! She's exactly as sweet and wonderful as she seems and we celebrated her new column at Marie Claire over free champagne. Well, 3 of us did.

Um, my bag looks enormous! Prada eyebrow glasses, Henrik Vibskov scarf, dress gifted to me by Christine Rhee (MORE ON THAT LATER HOLY SHIT) and Jil Sander shoes that you can't see. I may be a bit of a spookster but I have this not-so-secret love for Miu Miu and the way it unabashedly makes me feel like a lady.

Serious collar action in Miu Miu's fall collection.

Dana trying her hand (heyo!) at hand modeling...W.E.R.K I.T.

And finally, this dress...by far my favorite piece in the entire store. This is not a dress that I'd ordinarily gravitate towards but something about it speaks to me. I can't decide if its the delicate rosettes or subtle waist pleats or saturated blush color, but I kind of want to be in a basket with it and roll around with bowties and rainbows. Oh well, can't hug every Miu Miu dress ;___;

try to understand the truth...there is no sleep.

2011-09-10T00:44:00.000-05:00

I am at New York Fashion Week. Yes, I have a lot of feelings about it. No, I am not going to talk about it right now because I've gotten maybe 10 hours of sleep in the past 3 days because I am couch-hopping and I haven't been able to eat much and my body hates me and my brain is making me delirious from the unintentional lack of self-care. However! Here's what I wore to United Bamboo and Mandy Coon today (MANDY COON WAS SO GOOD BLOG POST COMING SOON!) and to do other various things that did not include sleeping:

Risto dress, Henrik Vibskov scarf, Mandy Coon top obscured by said Henrik Vibskov scarf, Chloe Sevs for Opening Cevs paisley tights, BLOODSHOT EYES COURTESY OF NYFW. How ~*chic*~ is this dirty mirror? Doesn't it just scream FASHUN? I told you I'm delirious.

Stopped into Seven today and picked up these incredible Ground Zero crystal leggings.

OKAY. SLEEP NOW. MAYBE. HA. SOS.

LONG LIVE PRINT

2011-08-30T10:51:00.001-05:00

I'm a really big advocate for print magazines. For me, fewer things are more enjoyable than curling up with a fresh new magazine over a mug of hot chocolate. Magazines have a way of captivating the senses in a way that blogs that never will, and this isn't a bad thing! There's always room for intelligent, insightful discussions about fashion and stunning editorials. Here's some of my favorites!

LURVE. No talk, just photos. Gorgeous full-page editorials and next-level styling that relies on statement pieces, not layers of prints or colors. The ultimate eyecandy magazine.

The Gentlewoman. A magazine that celebrates the working woman from a practical and approachable point of view. I love reading the interviews of inspiring diverse women from all walks of life; fashion, film, music, art, politics, literature, journalism. The editorials are styled to reflect how women dress in the real world, no lofty glamour here! Possibly the closest thing to a feminist fashion magazine (without writing specifically about feminism).

Lula. This magazine is a delight for the senses. I'm not really sure what else I can say about it that hasn't been said before, so I'll just direct you to Nicolette's excellent write-up. She really captures its essence rather eloquently. My favorite issue is #7, pictured above. It celebrates the spooky girl who wears black and finds beauty in the darker side of things. Obviously this appeals to my interests.

BLEND. Definitely my favorite magazine right now. I eagerly await each new issue and block out an entire evening to read and reread it from cover to cover. It's an oversized Dutch publication that blends (heyo!) fashion with art and music and brilliant writing. BLEND talks about fashion from a wide-eyed, optimistic perspective and celebrates the best of it. Completely not pretentious in the slightest but it still manages to feel like your impossibly cool friend who is always gushing with exciting things to share with you. The editorials are some of the most creative in print today - always cutting-edge with the contemporary appeal of visual art. I always feel like a "hip" "in-crowd" person when I finish reading an issue of BLEND, and that (temporary) ego boost is worth the cost of print alone.

All of these magazines (except LURVE) are available at Quimby's Books in Wicker Park. Please consider supporting an independant local bookstore.

It's worth mentioning that while these magazines greatly inspire me, there's nothing in print today that is written from an explicitly feminist point of view. Fashion and feminism have a long history of at best, ignoring one another, but they can (and SHOULD) coexist peacefully. Luckily Isabel is well aware of this gaping hole and wants to make a difference, but she needs your help! You can watch her video and vote for her every day here to help her get started with the first feminist fashion magazine.

What are some your favorite magazines? Do share!

strange times

2011-08-28T17:36:00.001-05:00

(horace sweater, austra tee, jeremy scott leggings, jil sander shoes)

Been wearing this outfit for the better part of a week now. It's perfect for the transitional weather we're experiencing. I was inspired by the Chameleons UK. I got this Horace sweater on eBay because it reminded me a lot of the Rodarte knits from a few seasons ago that I never quite got over. I can even flip the hem over my neck and wear it as a cape/cardigan thing. It's surprisingly warm but it gets caught on just about everything. My steps have to be deliberate and precise when I am wearing it.

This outfit would be vastly improved with some jewelry, but sadly I've never been much of a jewelry person. Perhaps Langoliers would change my mind...their knit chain necklaces would certainly compliment this sweater perfectly.

What passes for my backyard.

i met mandy coon, and all i got was this post.

2011-08-24T22:33:00.002-05:00

So, a few weeks ago I was invited to a presentation of Mandy Coon's Fall 2011 collection at the W Hotel, and interview Mandy herself. I jumped at the chance to do "legitimate fashion things" for my blog, as opposed to posting silly photos of my sillier outfits! Plus, I heard there would be a free open cocktail bar, so, you know, there's that.

As Mandy understandably was in high demand, my interview with her took place as we were scurrying down stairs and down an elevator and a million people were flitting about and well, basically, it was the awkwardest interview ever. You know how in TV shows and movies, journalists swarm a celeb or politician or in the case of Law & Order, an evil perp or hapless victim outside of the courtroom? Yeah, it was kind of like that except far less glamorous. Luckily she's super nice and laid-back so it didn't feel any more clumsy than it needed to be. Also I recorded the interview on my phone but it broke the next day when I stupidly dropped it on the ground. So unfortunately I cannot transcribe the interview. You're crushed, I know.

In Chicago, fashion events are much more of a social gathering. The clothes kind of take a backseat to schmoozing and drinking free alcohol and conforming to Chicago's version of fabulousness. I'm not really into that kind of thing because I am there to see clothing, but granted, I had a good time. My only complaint was the models were presented in a dark stairwell and I couldn't get any good photos with my f/2.8 lens, let alone a good look, at the very thing I was there to see.

I mostly talked to Mandy about her excellent, if comparatively understated Fall 2011 collection. There was definitely a more mature feel to it but with more "business lady with a secret life" kind of vibe. And I do firmly believe that maturity is not a bad thing! By disparaging conservative style shifts as a product of age, we turn aging into this monster that should be feared, and through fear of course comes mockery. Youthfulness should not be the standard or the ideal. Instead, perhaps we should view all stages of life for what they are, and as a whole, as part of the human experience that connects us all together.

One of my favorite little details about Mandy Coon's collections are how she names pieces after songs. And not just any songs, but songs that speak to my heart like "The Lovecats" or "Get The Balance Right". You won't find ~The Lissa Dress~ or ~The Ashley Blouse~ with her collections. I asked her how she decided which song titles are worthy of her pieces, and she simply explained that it has a lot to do with how the mood of the song fits with the mood of the piece as an individual, and often times it happens to be what's on her playlist while she works. So basically, Mandy Coon has good taste in music and that made me appreciate her zillion times more.

It's a giant lamp. I mean.

Nancy Whang from LCD Soundsystem.

"Venus in Furs" coat and "If I Had a Heart" dress.

MANDY COON LIKES FEVER RAY.

Mandy Coon in a dress of her own design.

As you can see, it was nearly impossible to get photos in that dark stairwell. A shame really, because it doesn't do justice to the rich textures and gently graduating colors of the clothes.

Mandy Coon DJed and played "She Bops" and my heart did melt.

Every time I felt that familiar pang of social anxiety, I gazed at the ceiling and it soothed my nerves.

lovemore

2011-08-22T21:37:00.001-05:00

i suck at polyvore, STFU. veronique branquinho archive dress from farfetch/rodarte x opening ceremony envelope blouse and long slashed skirt/rodarte x nicholas kirkwood candlewax heels, in my closet/meadham kirchhoff blouse/deborah lippmann "today was a fairy tale"/risto moon dress from les nouvelles/rodarte x opening ceremony floral blouse/mandy coon leather top, on its way to me/rodarte x repetto lace-ups, in my closet/mary katrantzou dress from colette/risto mint moon dress from les nouvelles

Those of you that have read my blog since the beginning have noticed that my style has changed somewhat. The blog was at first a love affair of the drapey black variety, but it doesn't feel like me anymore. I was never the type of person that could maintain a look for any given amount of time; it's always ebbed and flowed with my age or my interests or financial situation or many things really.

In shifting my style, I'm starting to take more inspiration from my heart and less from fashion itself. And in my heart is shoegaze, pink noise and walls of sound and crashing guitar waves and whispery croons. Yes, I realize how silly that sounds.

Ugh, I feel incredibly...pathetic? to care so much about such a niche genre of music. I mean, shoegaze is a tiny sausagefest (see what I did there?) that is usually laughed at by other mainstream and underground scenes alike, for being full of unfashionable people who listen to mopey music and plug their guitars through too many effects pedals. And to some extent...that's true. But shoegaze as a scene, as a lifestyle, is the only thing I've ever been able to fully identify with.

So in amalgamating my love of fashion with music, I'll do so by referencing the basic principles of what shoegaze is. Dreamy rock music with swirly textures, a little bit of grit, and a lot of noise. I want my style to transcend references to fashion itself and go somewhere else entirely, the way my brain does when I listen to Loveless. Less severe lines, more whimsey and dreaminess. Blissful prints and colors. And lots of band t-shirts to celebrate the scene.

moses

2011-08-15T10:42:00.000-05:00

(rodarte x opening ceremony cardigan, aa blouse and skirt, spanx socks, alexander wang boots, thrift store bag, spike necklace from a fetish shop)

It is a rather curious feeling to dress angsty, but not feel angsty. There was a time in my life, sure, when the world as it exists just filled me with an inordinate amount of hate that I couldn't wait to direct at the nearest pillow or angry teen poem. But getting older has mellowed out my rage into something akin to cosmic background radiation. Forever minutely pervasive, just barely detactable beyond my everyday consciousness. Nowadays I'm interested in solutions vs. problems and allies vs. enemies. After all, the world is an impossible place in which to be a woman. Is it really necessary to make it harder for yourself? And by extension, the other women with whom we share a society that does not regard us as equals? Looking back on my younger days, I'm ashamed of my shit-talking and self-loathing and painful vulnerabilities and undeniable hypocrisy. But growing up wouldn't be as special if I didn't learn something along the way. The world is a horrifically unjust place, and there will always be something to be angry about. Anger in of itself doesn't solve problems. Real-world solutions and motivation an interpersonal connections and yes, idealism!, are the the only things that will help.

rodarte megalast burls forever

2011-08-10T14:01:00.004-05:00

I am finding it increasingly impossible to believe that the Mulleavy sisters are not psychopathic fans of the Cocteau Twins. There's just no way they don't listen to this band! Every time they release a new collection, I can so blatantly see the references to the Cocteau Twins' entire back catalogue. Liz Fraser sang in her own mystical language, she sang of emotions and nonsensical objects (pearly dewdrops? cherry-colored funk? love's easy tears? click through to listen!) that exist only in her own alternate esoteric plane, but her emphatic croons make them feel so real. Rodarte designs in a similarly impressionistic manner. The new Rodarte for Opening Ceremony collection is champagne colors, florals, delicate rococo tendrils of fabric. These are clothes that feel like a pleasant, if not vaguely faraway dream. They use silhouettes that seem to reference pretty basic patterns but through use of things like slits and sharp shoulders and dreamy tones, it feels like something not of this physical world. (edit: now with more images!)

Cocteau Twins - In Our Angelhood

It looks like a condom. I know. Just listen to the song.

The green dress looks like a Christmas tree, but Liz Fraser's version of a Christmas Tree. Something like...Pepper-Tea Ruffle Habiliment? Treeheart and Frocklove?

The standout looks for me, of course, were these Jane Eyre-inspired all-black ensembles that feel like the murkiest depths of Head Over Heels. Severe shapes meet whimsy and texture, and far-removed spookiness that feels comforting for the soul. Already plotting to get my hands on the goat hair coat and that sheer panel long-sleeve dress. My fall and winter should feel like a blissful Cocteau Twins daydream.

comforts of madness

2011-07-30T20:08:00.000-05:00

I turned 26 yesterday.

light from a dead star.

2011-07-25T11:03:00.002-05:00

(risto dress as a skirt, austra t-shirt, zana bayne harness, ld tuttle for urban outfitters boots)

I'm smiling! Holy shit! Now you see why I never smile in photos! Goodbye followers!

If you live anywhere in the Midwest, you've no doubt been subjected to the heat wave that has commandeered our normally-pleasant mid-July. The heat has been absolutely brutal. Most days I just want to wear a sheer tank top and a simple skirt, but the other day I felt like wearing something slightly more interesting. I've taken to wear my dresses with a band t-shirt over it with a harness to keep everything in place.

It was only after I put this outfit together that I realized that I was wearing the exact same color scheme as Split by Lush.

i'm sorry, but your band sucks.

2011-07-18T13:11:00.000-05:00

Just a few styling tricks I've been doing lately. 1) I cut my hair. I was really inspired by Leigh Lezark's signature severe hairstyle, and I'm really enjoying playing with my new asymmetrical cut. 2) Wearing my racerback tops backwards with a bandeau underneath to keep the girls in place. It's a lot of fun to look at a garment and think not of what it is, but what it could be. 3) Matte orange lipstick, all day, everyday.

i just want to be a unique special snowflake.

2011-07-15T13:28:00.001-05:00

(photo by amy)

So, Refinery29 was nice enough to include me in their list of "Best and Brightest Chicago Bloggers". Me, really?! I'm that kid that got mercilessly teased in school and ate my sandwiches alone at lunch and secretely pined away about being friends with the Plastics even though they were the ones mercilessly teasing me. So something like this is a pretty big deal and truly goes a long way towards resolving my Emotionally Damaging Teenage Years. Who needs thousands of dollars worth of therapy when you can just write a blog?

If you care: I'm wearing a vest as a top and bag both from a thrift store, spike necklace from a fetish shop, AA skirt that I probably should have ironed, and Gareth Pugh shoes. I was going for a Versus Spring 2011 silhouette (drapes n' pleats, BRILLIANT), except with mall goth vibes. Because mall goth will never stop being hilarious to me.

looking up you see my spirit glow

2011-07-14T12:08:00.001-05:00

(uo jacket, second-hand cheap monday leather shorts from a resale shop, shredded tights, john's ride t-shirt, ebay'd miu miu shoes)

I took these photos a few weeks ago (before I cut my hair!) and never got around to posting them because I was unhappy with the quality of the images, but I decided to stop being a neurotic blog perfectionist. At least, not as much of a neurotic blog perfectionist. I wore this to go see Austra at Beauty Bar (who was outstanding, by the way) and just wanted to wear something more casual for a cool summer night. I borrowed John's Ride t-shirt which I seem to be doing a lot lately. This t-shirt is just so fucking awesome and I am so jealous that he owns it and I do not! I mean, it's the cover of Nowhere which aside from being part of the Holy Shoegaze Trifecta*, is also one of my favorite albums covers of all time and totally appeals to my love of stark places/art, and is one of the few rock albums which is generally agreed to be perfect from start to finish. If you've never listened to Nowhere, I implore you to do so as soon as possible, your heart will thank you for it.

Keeping the black n' blue theme going with my Miu Miu cat shoes. I like the idea of wearing them in a non-cutesy manner because that's the exact opposite of how everyone seems to be styling them. One thing I enjoy in my self-styling is removing the allure of ~designer objects~ and just integrating the piece into something that feels right for me.

*MBV's Loveless, Ride's Nowhere, and Slowdive's Souvlaki are typically considered to be the Holy Shoegaze Trifecta. Far from being just exemplary shoegaze albums, they are incredible rock masterpieces that have influenced countless bands in their respective legacies. Modern rock music wouldn't be the same without them.

these things that i have done

2011-07-13T11:47:00.003-05:00

(photo by Amy)

So...uh...as you can see here, I bought Gareth Pugh shoes. It was kind of an impulse buy because lord knows the last thing I need is more shoes, but I saw these on eBay and they were super affordable and I've wanted them for years and ugh I'm totally justifying an unnecessary purchase right now. Honestly though, I haven't been able to take them off my feet since I bought them because they look SO GOOD with everything I own so I suppose I'm getting my money's worth. Plan on seeing a lot of these. They are so badass in real life - I feel like a post-apocalyptic warrior whenever I wear them. That's a good feeling, I think.

walkin' around in our summertime clothes?

2011-07-12T00:32:00.003-05:00

Camera's in the shop so you get an iPhone photo for today. Unseasonably cool summer night meant that I could wear my new Proenza x J Brand jeans out for the first time since I got them on eBay. The first stop in this outfit was an outdoor shoegaze bbq...seriously. It was mildly disorienting to see my shoegaze friends under sunset light as opposed to shrouded in the meager glow of local bars. Shoegaze: a scene by and for ex-mall goths who are still scared of the sun. ~*NeVeR LoSe tHaT FeeLiNG*~

And the winner of my giveaway, the new lucky owner of a brand-new copy of The Gentlewoman #2 is...Pneumonia White! Miss Pneumonia had her name pulled out of a hat, and by hat I mean it was actually a wine glass, and by glass I mean it is made of cheap plastic. You all should check out her blog! It's one of my new favorites nowadays, her style is like a fairy nun princess and I adore her intimate dairy-style writing. Stay tuned for more print giveaways coming up, I love showering my blog readers with excellent reads!

giveaway! the gentlewoman #2

2011-06-30T11:00:00.004-05:00

It's well-known that I am a fashion magazine junkie. Not quite to the admirable level of Ready Set Fashion, but print is one of my favorite things in life. The Gentlewoman is one of my most beloved fashion/lifestyle magazines. Printed on deliciously matte paper and bound by a cover that feels like a literary journal, it features strong women whose ambition inspires the best parts of femininity. The retro styling and typefaces make the magazine feel an heirloom book that you've loved forever. Fashion editorials are styled with practical yet modern sensibilities, clothes for women who work. I deliriously devour each issue, reveling in the magazine's effect of making you feel classy just for reading it.

I ordered the Gentlewoman #2 from American Apparel and it arrived with a giant gash down the cover. I stood on the phone with customer service demanding a replacement. The replacement finally arrived...4 months later. In an effort to turn poor customer service lemons into lemonade I've decided to give away the pristine copy to a lucky blog reader!

To enter: follow my blog on blogger or google reader or bloglovin'. Or don't. I'm not fishing for followers. I just want this magazine to find a good home where it will be appreciated. The only requirement is that you must leave a valid email address in the comments section and be a US resident. I'll pick a winner at random on Monday, July 11th. Good luck!

GIRLYGAZE: a latterstyle mix

2011-06-29T22:16:00.003-05:00

I apologize for that unannounced absence! I was a bit busy dealing with very IRL things that have temporarily zapped my creative energies and enthusiasm for "posting outfits on the internet." Sometimes a quick break is helpful to refresh the brain. And while I don't have anything fashion-related today, I do have something very special for you all. I've been meaning for some time to post more music content, my dear readers, because truthfully I am a music nerd before I'm a fashion nerd.

This mix, entitled GIRYGAZE, is a collection of shoegaze-ish songs all from bands that contain a lady. One reason I love shoegaze so much is because it is a genre that, when compared to others, seems to eschew the whole "girls can't rock" thing, both when the movement first started in the late 80s and in the resurgence of shoegaze bands today. One could argue that this is because shoegaze tends to sounds more "feminine"; dreamy, swirly pink noise lends itself quite well to whispered lady vocals. And that would be a fair assesment. But it is also worth noting that Rachel Goswell from Slowdive sang less songs than Neil Halstead, Debbie Gooch from My Bloody Valentine and Lorelei Meetze from Film School play bass and don't sing at all, and the Dum Dum Girls are an all-female band. So while the music style (like most forms of rock music) isn't completely egalitarian, it's certainly a lot more inclusive than most, without touting their female band members in a tokenist way (however, the blantant objectification of Miki Berenyi in Lush was an unfortunate exception).

I sincerely hope you all enjoy this mix. Let me know what you think!

Note: I realize Ladytron isn't a shoegaze band, but their one shoegazey song is better than some bands' entire discographies. Thus, its inclusion.

click here to download.

tracklist

1. blackout - lush - split

2. there is a light that never goes out - dum dum girls - he gets me high ep

3. dust devil - school of seven bells - disconnect from desire

4. lectric - film school - hideout

5. souvlaki space station - slowdive - souvlaki

6. the absolute elsewhere - thee heavenly music association - shaping the invisible

7. spring and by summer fall - blonde redhead - 23

8. love fade - tamaryn - the waves

9. drive it all over me - my bloody valentine - you made me realize ep

10. pack you up - black tambourine - s/t

11. white light generator - ladytron - witching hour

12. musette and drums - cocteau twins - head over heels

xoxo

summer kick-off weekend

2011-06-08T13:23:00.002-05:00

Summer has finally reached the shores of Lake Michigan! I'm sure the city was collectively thinking it may never arrive, considering just 3 weeks ago we were all still wearing our winter coats. Summer began in a major way for me this past weekend, first with the SlutWalk (which deserves its own post because I feel the need to sanctimoniously delve into the issues surrounding rape culture and sexual assault stigmatization and ugh just everything and I am sorry in advance if that future post is preachy), and then with not one, but TWO shows by my dear friends A Place to Bury Strangers. I've been a fan of Oliver's music since the days of Skywave which I guess makes me some kind of Real Shoegazer OG, probably the equivalent of being a worldwide underwater basketweaving champion. Which is to say, of course, completely useless and laughable in the grand scheme of things. But!

First things first, I suppose. Here's what I wore to their show at the street fest. Risto dress from Filene's (my mid-twenties bank account loves you, Filene's <2 <3). Zana Bayne harness that you're probably sick of seeing me wear (IDGAF). Waaaay old shredded tights that I'll be wearing all summer. Thrifted bag, Alexander Wang boots from eBay that I like to wear socks with pulled over so they don't look like very obvious Alexander Wang boots. Still on a mall goth kick. I just find it incredibly hilarious to poke fun at a lifestyle I took so! seriously! as a 15-year-old. The poor sartorial decisions of my teenage years are proving to be a source of inspiration for my twenties, albeit somewhat ironically and mostly self-mockingly. I also wanted to dress slightly trashy because I wanted to mirror the Do-Division street fest around me. As you can see, poor Division Street was reduced to a chaos of spilled beer and the trampled containers that probably once housed said beers.

So like I said, A Place to Bury Strangers performed two shows. One at Do-Division, the other at the hallowed Empty Bottle which is one of my favorite places to see live music in Chicago. If you've never seen A Place to Bury Strangers, I'll just summarize it quickly by saying that it's an experience. Oliver thrashes his guitar all over the stage in a disorienting effort to drag as much feedback out of the stacks as he can; it looks very chaotic and perhaps parts of it are, but much of it is quite calculated. Once his guitar strings are shredded beyond playability, he will create effects-laden noise with his his amp plug and custom-made Death by Audio pedals alone. And of course, their music is ear-splittingly loud thanks to an amplification system that would be serviceable for a stadium show. I've only ever seen one band that was louder than these guys: My Bloody Valentine. Click for better res.

Who needs strings?!

It's always incredibly gratifying to see friends do well because they are talented. I'm a firm believer that exceptional bands/artists/designers/etc deserve to be successful.

breaking blog rules

2011-05-28T19:38:00.002-05:00

Preen dress, Zana Bayne harness that I seriously wear EVERYWHERE, it's kind of obnoxious. Photos by Tyler.

Breaking a major blog rule of mine: no party photos allowed. This will probably be the first and last time party photos appear on my blog, mostly because I am a midtwentysomething hermit and I never leave my apartment and the outside world scares me and I have no friends and #foreveralone and whatnot. But I really liked how I looked that night! I'm really into clothes that utilize some kind of negative space, whether its through sheer fabric or cutouts. Also, I still can't over how much I love my new everyday glasses. I've met my eyewear soulmate and am absolutely smitten. It's kind of nice to wear glasses that aren't necessarily spooky on their own, but fit perfectly with my spooky wardrobe. Good design, my friends.

some things never change.

2011-05-24T09:29:00.002-05:00

on my phone, as of late...

first nice day of the year/ insanely jealous of my boyfriend's ride shirt/wake-up pup/ sometimes i actually leave my house/ for your many sins/ a good shopping trip at quimby's/ chickpea/ chicago or mordor?/ where were you?/ a very miu mail day/ fever ray at zombie prom

"lady talk/times" over vanilla ice cream and stuff

2011-05-22T01:52:00.002-05:00

I'm still here! And if you are reading this, you are too! Was kinda looking forward to chillin' in da afterlife with my crew and your crew and meeting up in heaven's bar around 2 (Biggie reference, showing off my ~culture and ~good music taste) but sadly (?) that was not meant to be. Which was a good thing because really great people like Tavi are around to hang out with on unexpectedly warm and always expectedly windy Saturdays. Chicago = Windy City is no fucking joke. We sat on a park bench for a while talking about lady things but the wind kept blowing our hair into our moody gothy girl lipstick, which is a Real Problem facing goth girls in America today. Equally difficult is eating food, so we blotted as much as we could and the result was kind of lulzy:

(some of these photos are on her blog but I want to post them anyway so uh, deal with it? INTERNET.)

Wearing spooky lipstick is really enjoyable but not so conducive to normal human biological things, like consuming food.

(Comme des Garcons for H&M jacket, Comme des Garcons shoes, AA mesh blouse, UO skirt, thrifted bag, spike necklace from a fetish shop)

Still dressing like it's Proenza Fall 2010. That collection has sunk into my consciousness so deeply, I don't forsee myself being unable to shake its influence anytime soon. Leather and black and blue and green and babydoll dresses and collars and pleats and spooky schoolgirl moods are all things that = me. It touched me so profoundly for a multitude of reasons which I should probably write about at some point.

Tavi looked incredible and riotous as per usual. Floral prints everywhere, a sight for sore eyes after a seven-month-long Chicago winter.

~something takes a part of me~

2011-05-19T22:01:00.001-05:00

So the folks at Laundry Magazine invited me to Growing Works, a fashion show that they were hosting. It was billed as a presentation of "emerging Chicago designers". Admittedly, I don't follow "emerging Chicago designers", so I figured this would be a good chance to learn about who's making clothes in the city that I live in. Plus, what midtwentysomething can resist the lure of free alcohol and an excuse to wear a new Risto dress? Surely not I!

The event was held at the Garfield Park Conservatory, which is really just a big glass building with lots of plants inside. I attended the pre-show schmoozing event alone with the intention of conquering my social anxiety, if just for a night!, and making an honest attempt to mingle. Yet, none of the other attendees said a single word to me. None. They were clad in Birkin bags and dripping blood diamonds, and I was the recipient of forced smiles and awkward stares. Going into the event I jokingly assumed that I would be ignored, but was kind of irked when it actually happened. The only other human being who acknowledged my presence in any sort of friendly a manner was a cocktail server who took sympathy upon my situation, and proceeded to keep my plastic cup flowing with mid-level champagne precisely garnished with a sprig of mint. A moderate buzz ensued. Not content to wallow in my wallflower status, free booze in tow, I set about exploring the artificial winding paths through the flora.

The sun shone just perfectly and the entire place was bathed in a soft, inviting light.

(aa mesh long sleeve and leggings, risto bimbiloski dress, spike necklace, chloe boots)

I got this spike necklace from a BDSM shop in Lakeview. I plan on wearing it all summer long.

This Risto dress was hunted down from Filene's by way of Jamie. It was marked down to almost 90% off retail price. I picked up the falcon face print and another dress in the same style in a plaid print. I love being able to purchase clothes by my favorite designers at a price I can afford!

My outfit was inspired my 15-year-old mall goth self. In 1999, I was your typical suburban angsty psuedo-goth who shopped at Hot Topic and snuck out to raves and voted daily for KoRn to be on Total Request Live. I got into that lifestyle as a way to rebel, sure, but not in the way that you'd think. I was going through some heavy shit at the time and that was the only I knew how to, like, "deal" with it. It was a way for me to proclaim my disaffection from the suburban Abercrombie & Fitch zombies that trolled the halls at school, but also a way for me to create a visceral world that allowed me to escape from the real-life problems I was dealing with at the time. So the mall goth thing, while kind of pathetic (and hilarious, to me, at least), it is also a very associative. It reminds me of how I dealt with those issues at that time, utilizing what little emotional maturity that I had access to, what little life experience and subsequent resilience I had come to possess.

So it was a little disconcerting to be completely ignored in a grown-up social setting simply because I was wearing an outfit that poked fun at my awkward teen years. I mean, it's one thing for preppy high school Plastics to make fun of me because I was wearing Kikwear jeans...it's entirely different in a conservatory full of adults who supposedly like fashion and embrace dressing in unconventional ways. I wasn't simply ignored - I was actively gawked at and the questions "who is that girl? and why is she here?" were splashed plainly across their faces. Fuck, these were adults! And I wasn't even dressed that ridiculous! Indeed, I was quite disappointed at the lack of maturity on behalf of the other guests. And suffice it to say, I won't be attending another similar event. Free booze or not. I can drink at home with my puppy and my boyfriend and dance to OMB records in my living room wearing my Rodarte shoes, and not be judged.

I am praying that New York Fashion Week isn't like that. Praying. Lighting Jesus candles in hopes of not dealing with that kind of bullshit.

Because my experience at the event was so negative, I don't believe I'm in any sort of position to offer an unbiased review of the clothes.* Here are the photos I took. You can make up your own mind.

*I will, however, mention that I thought the model's makeup was a complete miss. Not pretty, not complementary to the clothes, and garish in comparison to the lighting of the venue. So there's that.

now that's just how shit goes in the struggle.

2011-05-17T23:06:00.002-05:00

I get asked a lot of questions about my thrifting and ebay hustle. It's true, I have gotten some incredible deals on designer things (god, I hate saying the term "designer things". ~*~*~A SHOE/GARMENT/OBJECT IS ONLY IMPORTANT WHEN IT'S DESIGNER*~*~, uhhh excuse me while I projectile vomit in your general direction.) that once retailed for stupid amounts of money. I am not in possession of stupid amounts of money. Therefore, I've developed by necessity some pretty good skills with regards to buying stuff for way cheap.

I'd estimate that about 85% of my wardrobe is secondhand. I rarely buy anything new, and even more rarely buy anything new that isn't heavily discounted. I simply don't have the money for it. Most people don't. Money is always a really uncomfortable subject to talk about, but let's have that discussion! Let's talk about how ridiculous it is that Alexander Wang charges $300 for basic cotton tank tops that are made in China. Or how jacked-up retail pricing is extremely classist. And since white people tend to be of higher socioeconomic status, how it is racist as well.

I derive a bit of glee in subverting some of the more evil parts of the fashion industry. And today, I'm going to share (some of) my secrets with you.

eBay.

eBay requires patience and discipline. It's much like watching a plant grow. Nevermind the fact that I have killed every single plant I've ever had! Even brown thumbs can partake in the fashion Eden that is eBay.

-Everything pops up on eBay at some point. You just have to wait long enough. On eBay, I've seen several pairs of triple-lace Ann D boots, Miu Miu cat collars, Mcqueen show pieces, current-season Christopher Kane space-print stuff, and that's how I eventually got my Prada eyebrow glasses. If there's a particular thing you've been lusting after for a long time, be sure to check eBay daily to see if someone has listed it.

-Sometimes the thing you want may not be in the colorway or exact style you were hoping for. Make mental sacrifices or take it to a tailor/cobbler. Or DIY it or something. It's not the end of the world.

-When it comes to shoes, don't buy them unless you know they will fit you perfectly. They could be the the most cat-printed, crystal-studded, highest platforming shoes ever, but if they're even half a size too small, you will never wear them. I can promise you.

-Rich ladies often clean out their closets to make room for even more highly expensive things. Must be nice, right? You can often tell if it's that kind of seller by viewing all of their listings at once. Because they are rich, money is of no consequence to them and they will list stuff at very low prices. TAKE ADVANTAGE.

-Place your bid within the last 50 seconds of the auction close. It's very hard to be outbid with so little time remaining on the clock. It can happen, of course, but this method makes losing a little less likely.

-Along those lines, it's very common for the price to double in the last 2 minutes of the auction. Don't bid more than you can afford just because the clock is ticking down. Fight the adrenaline. That item or something similar will be listed again one day.

-Bid in odd amounts. Never bid with number that ends in 0 or 5. I have the best luck by bidding with a number ending in 7.

-Know your sizes! I can't stress this enough. Often times, shoes and clothes will be listed in international sizes, so be aware of what your different sizes are. Brands very between sizing so much that it can be impossible to keep track sometimes. Be That Person and go to Nordstrom or Barney's to try on designer stuff to find out what your size is, so there's no question when you're bidding on eBay.

Thrifting.

-Thrift stores in rich neighborhoods. Thrift stores in rich neighborhoods. Thrift stores in rich neighborhoods. That is all you need to know.

-Oh, and avoid polyester. Unless you like wearing it, don't buy anything made of polyester because it will sit in your closet forever.

Good luck guys! So tell me: what's the best thing in your closet that you bought from eBay or thrifting?

20/20 in 2012

2011-05-09T22:25:00.000-05:00

A category that is often sadly overlooked, yet is immensely important to those unfortunate souls as myself who must wear them everyday, is eyewear. I am a firm believer that eyewear should be one of the most important considerations a four-eyed person can make. After all, glasses are worn every single day on the most visible part of your body. They should be as obscenely excellent as possible. Think of glasses as facial decorations. Um, I mean...uh, yeah. Erasing that unfortunate mental entendre from my brain now. But if that's your thing...! That's cool I guess!

Anyway! Let's take a look (herp derp see what I did there) at those designers who made glasses that did not suck. Note that not that many designers sent eyewear down the runway to begin with. The bespectacled: always ignored, #foreveralone, sad panda, etc.

Prada

Prada has been a serious roll with their eyewear lately. Not that they were ever off the roll to begin with. Is that the proper way to diametrically oppose that first statement? Do I care? With last year's not-commercially-produced bitchface eyebrow glasses to this spring's next-level baroque madness, they have been one of the few designers putting serious thought into creating interesting eyewear. For fall, they have continued their trend of creating glasses that are big enough to have their own orbiting celestial bodies. These science lab glasses in autumn-y colors consume a good 33.33% of your entire face. Their sheer size is balanced by medium-tinted lenses that are just transparent enough. The kind of nerdwear that you could rock on the subway train if you wanted no one to speak to you. Which is not a bad thing, considering the unacceptable things that creeps like to say to women on mass transit. PS: if you are interested in fighting against sexual harassement in public spaces, please visit Hollaback! for more information. We DON'T have to put up with it.

Miu Miu

Miuccia, again, though we really surprised? The grandmother of cat-lady fashion brings us more awkward stuff for your eyes. These glasses are oddly flattering, considering the choice of an unusual trapezoidal frame. The sharp, slanted edges really highlight the cheekbones while the arched brow makes up for the fact that the frame hide your real actual brows. The old-timey hardware prevents the glasses from looking like something you'd buy as a joke at Spencer's, and instead classes them up with some old-school sensibility. Humor and refinement in one pair of glasses? The styling possibilities are endless with these.

Givenchy

But by far the biggest winners of the eyewear this season is Givenchy. These glasses are MAJOR. I am extremely reticent to use that word because everyone and their mom and cousin and puppy says it to describe something that oftentimes, well, isn't. BUT THESE GLASSES! They are the ultimate cat-eyes because they contain actual perching cats. The idea of lounging animals on the arms of glasses seems so blatantly obvious, but Givenchy is the first to do it. I mean, the arms of glasses are uncharted territory, ripe with possibilities for other perching objects. Take note, eyewear designers! The purple, velvet, and yellow frames are all so pleasing on the face, but that yellow color is especially killer. I'd be lying if I didn't say that I am actively concocting various harebrained schemes to obtain these in the fall.

if you're a foot/shoe fetishist, you will probably love this post

2011-05-06T10:43:00.003-05:00

(marni via ebay with uo socks , comme des garcons via ebay with uo socks, thrifted acne pumps with aa mesh tights, rodarte x repetto oxfords with aa tights and a really stupid teen vogue jump)

A bit (a lot?) of narcissistic quick post, I'm aware! But I had a rare moment of free time and decided to figure out some ways to wear my summer shoes before summer actually comes. Transitional footwear, I suppose.

I found these blue suede Acne pumps at a thrift store a few weeks ago for dirt cheap. They aren't in perfect condition, but mostly I'm just happy to give them a good home. You never know what you're going to find when you go thrifting! 90% of the time I leave empty-handed, but that 10% when I find something incredible makes the 90% so worth it. I can't really stress the stylistic/ethical/environmental/economic value of thrifting and secondhand shopping enough.

the stars are out tonight, only they can hear you breathing

2011-04-29T13:13:00.002-05:00

I got new glasses! They're as big as a planet! And I'm very excited about them. For those of us that are ~~cursed~~blessed with poor vision, getting a new pair of eyeglasses is almost equivalent to getting a new car. They may not come with New Car Smell, but they come with Oh, I Finally Updated My Prescription And Can See Properly Again!

I knew that I wanted another pair of blue glasses, and this cornflower blue delighted me almost immediately. It strangely works with my warm skin tone which is kind of antithetical, but I think that's just the product of excellent design. The brand of these specs are RVSbyV.

MAC matte lipstick in So Chaud. Orange lipstick and blue glasses are hardly a more perfect pair. I'm generally not one to participate in trends, but orange lipstick is one I can get behind.

When choosing a pair of glasses, I pay close attention to the way it looks from a profile. Clean lines and minimal convex curvature is a must. Jamie sent me a few of these barrettes which looks really solid with my rose-print AA blouse. I'd first seen this print on the other Meagan and had mini-seizures over the not-so-vague Jil Sander spring '11-inspired print. I prefer this print, actually, because the roses are pastel and magical and they feel like a Cocteau Twins song. Like if these flowers were real, they'd be covered in pearly dewdrops' drops and love's easy tears.

(Stepping away from wearing black a little. It's a work in progress, but I don't like to pigeonhole myself into just one style.)

Rosy collar action in 2011.

Jamie also included her zine with the barrettes. It's full of beautiful things that as women, we unfortunately don't tell each other and ourselves enough.

it's always christmas on my head

2011-04-21T12:52:00.001-05:00

Amy was nice enough to take this photo of me, and equally nice enough to write nice things about me, so I though that sharing this photo with you all would be, well,...nice. Ahem. Thanks Amy!

This outfit has lately been a kind of uniform of sorts - just "edgy" enough that passerby wouldn't mistake me for a trixie, yet warm enough to get through Chicago's annual Sort-Of Spring. By Sort-Of Spring, I mean that it's 35 degrees and rainy until well into the middle of May. Uniqlo coat via ebay, thrifted Karl Lagerfeld x H&M jacket, American Apparel blue blouse, thrifted black blouse, thrifted leggings, Comme des Garcons shoes also from ebay, thrifted bag, Zana Bayne harness, MAC lipstick in Cyber. This lipstick, being called Cyber and all, makes me think of AOL and how the internet was this new cool exciting thing back in, uh, 1998. Suddenly, people didn't have to have long-distance sex over the phone, because a 56K modem meant that for the first time, you could see boobs in *real time*...nevermind the fact that in 1998, *real time* meant that your photo still took 30 minutes to load. But, uh, how would I know such things?! In 1998, I was using AOL just to chat with my cool older friend in middle school who was seductively Wiccan and had a pentacle as her IM avatar (rebelling against my Catholic upbringing, let me tell you.) By the time I was old enough to send boob photos over the internet (OH SHUT UP, LIKE YOU'VE NEVER DONE IT. TO THE LEFT!), broadband was already commonplace and AOL was more like LOL and only old people still thought that you needed AOL to access the magicalunicorninternetland.

Also, for those of you that know anything about hair, SOS PLEASE SEND HELP. My naturally thin hair has gotten so long that it literally has the consistency of Christmas tinsel on my head. It. Does. Nothing. At this point I'm tempted to chop it all off again but I know that the minute I see those hard-earned locks hit the ground, I'll turn into Angelina Jolie from The Changeling. "MY BAAAABBBYYYYY!!!"

"real" is simply electric signals interpreted by your brain

2011-04-07T14:00:00.014-05:00

I bought the new issue of POP Magazine specifically because while flipping through it at Quimby's, I noticed this hauntingly beautiful spread (and not just because my friend is in it, haha). Jacquelyn Jablonski is in tough, tailored pieces in a black and blue palette while seemingly stranded in a post-apocalyptic desert. Obviously all of these things are highly appealing to me. The styling itself is a little dystopian with its found-in-a-bomb-shelter modesty and unfinished hems that suggest that perhaps the garments and world have seen better days. The setting reminds me a lot of the scene in The Matrix where Morpheus explains to Neo how the surface exists in its current state - a devastated world devoid of color and beauty with a desperately scorched sky.

I'm especially intrigued by the styling in the second-right image; the sheer turtleneck with the bra over it. This feels so painfully obvious to me now, as I look at it, and I wonder why I haven't thought to do something like this before. Fashion editorials are at their best when they can inspire the viewer to capture the pictured beauty with their own wardrobe.

five ten fifty folds

2011-04-05T14:21:00.025-05:00

Five things I've been obsessed with lately.

1. Wearing my hair in braids. I need to get my split ends trimmed.

2. MAC lipstick in Cyber...I have NO idea why I didn't buy this sooner.

3. Jil Sander silk blouse, about $3 from a thrift store. The blouse features superbly-designed hidden buttons, and after wearing it for weeks on end, buttons just feel so...excessive nowadays.

4. Clearer skin. I've suffered from acne for well over 10 years now and my new dermatologist knows what he's doing.

5. Zana Bayne Alter harness. I got this harness specifically because I wear collared shirts fairly often, and I loved the way this particular harness resembles a necktie.

you have got to be the last one standing.

2011-03-29T23:02:00.001-05:00

(image via)

Tonight is the last night that the nightmare known as Cabrini-Green will live to see the sun rise. Tomorrow morning, the last remaining building will be torn down. A sordid chapter of Chicago's history will be demolished, a literal Target put in place, to mark the site where so many lived and loved and lost their lives.

I haven't the knowledge or wherewithal to begin to write about the sorrow that the housing projects caused for many people. I have too much privilege to condescendingly describe the squalid conditions that low-income families were forced by necessity, birthright, actually!, to live in. So I won't.

Instead I want to talk about humanity. Fashion I'm discovering, exists in a sort of bubble that claps its ears around its head and plants its palms around its eyes. Folks go through their days blissfully unaware of the human suffering that millions endure each day - billions, really, if you want to get global - and instead finely hones its attention on the latest permutation of the college-tuition-costing Birkin bag. It boggles the brain to imagine, just for a second, all of the attention and time and money that is diverted (is that the right word? displaced, perhaps?) towards things that once the sand hits the coffin, don't fucking matter.

The only thing that matters is our humanity. Every kiss, every tear that is shed, every heart that is broken and put back together again and broken again and put back together once more, sometimes by the asshole who broke it in the first place. Every time you look something or someone so achingly beautiful your body responds in kind via goosebumps or a flutter in your stomach. Every single instance of pain, every moment of all-consuming love until the love inevitably runs out, every day of ambivalence that starts in your twenties and lasts for god-knows-how-long, every time you apologize for hurting someone you love even if you're disingenuous about it. This is a small glimpse of the human condition, and it's only thing that ties us all together.

All of the residents of Cabrini-Green lived through these all-too-real experiences just like you have. And that's why you should be aware of the demolition of these people's homes...because they are people. Human beings. It's so easy for those that have to ignore those that haven't got, but in the end we all up in the same six by four space and the haves become essentially quite meaningless. So while we're living our day-to-day lives (on borrowed time, I may add), I implore you all to not forget about those who are less fortunate. Charity events to pat yourself on the back and assauge some kind of guilt is not what I'm talking about. I mean, to like, look around your studio/apartment/luxury condo/house/mansion/whatever and be appreciative of the roof over your head. Be grateful every single day that you won the American lottery and weren't born into the cycle of poverty that's consumed more lives than you can possibly imagine.

I love style because in it, I can represent my own human experience. Dressing nerdy? Well, that's a reclamation of the torment I endured as a kid because I liked school and had literally zero friends (things that haven't really changed in the progressive years). Harnesses? A small way to announce to the world that I was born with kinks. And it's why I hope I never become jaded - I cherish my humanity too much. It's really all that we have.

RIP, Cabrini-Green. Hopefully your death will bring peace to your residents and will awaken those don't care from their human slumber.

anxiety always in the age of anxiety

2011-03-26T20:36:00.001-05:00

(from fashion gone rogue)

Fell in love with this editorial immediately. It's deliberate, purposefully disassociative, and ultimately anxiety-inducing. Her coldly premeditated outfits beg the question, why is she alone in her home, dressed to the nines, seemingly with nowhere to go? It's this classic "caged woman" idea, and plays on our voyeuristic tendencies. These photos are so meticulously lit and composed, they almost feel like carefully constructed dioramas...albeit with a heavy dose of white-knuckle calculation. Reminds me a lot of the erotic work by another of my favorite photographers (and a good friend), Chas Ray Krider. His work explores the fetish of transient sex by way of motel rooms. He also primarily utilizes stiff lighting and angles, cooly aloof models, and crime scene-esque tableaus that feel just as pressure-ridden are they are sensual.

every day like a hustle

2011-03-21T13:09:00.004-05:00

What happens when our garments suffer some kind of imperfection? What happens when a seam tears, an eyelet rips, a button falls off, a strap comes undone? An item of clothing is, after all, just a physical object constructed of fabric, and its delicacies are inherent in its creation. Most garments, no matter how well-made, have lives that are finite. Should they be tossed into the trash and added to the approximately 12 million tons of textile waste that the US produces each year? Or can they be worn and loved despite their imperfections? That's the idea I've explored in last night's outfit.

Sheer blouse is from a thrift store and a couple buttons are missing. I'm wearing it upside down and with the last few remaining buttons inserted into not-corresponding holes. My pencil skirt is by Jil Sander and is also from a thrift store. The outside of the skirt is structurally intact but the inner lining is torn quite garishly, and is probably the reason it ended up in a thrift store in the first place. Shoes are Maison Martin Margiela that I bought for $1 on ebay because they have surely seen better days. I had every intention of taking them to be repaired, but eventually decided that I like the conceptual lived-in feel of the torn leather straps. It's like something Martin Margiela would have designed intentionally.

My Comme des Garcons for H&M jacket is also from ebay and "features" a broken zipper. It sticks about halfway down, so I have to keep it zipped up all the way and put it on like a pullover. This wasn't mentioned in the listing and the seller suffered the wrath of my negative feedback. When it comes to ebay, I don't fucking play. It's still wearable, however, and I especially enjoyed the way that the blouse peeks out under the jacket's deconstructed hemline.

My poorly-done wrist tattoos are a reference to the book House of Leaves.* I had them done at a studio in Chicago (that will remain nameless) shortly after I moved here about 3.5 years ago. The tattoo artist spent much of the session trying to convince me to go out on a date with him and not enough time paying attention to my tattoos (I shot him down pretty hilariously in case you're wondering). The lines aren't straight and the colors have bled, especially on the hollow blue square. I've been meaning to get them touched up for a long time. But there is a certain beauty in imperfection and perhaps that's why I haven't yet made an appointment to have them fixed. Or maybe I'm just lazy.

*SELF-CONSCIOUS DISCLAIMER: I realize that House of Leaves is pretentious with its po-mo literary devices and borders on gimmicky drivel, but I read the book during a very critical period of my life. I hate having to justify the things that I enjoy but unfortunately people reaaaallllly like to judge others based on their harmless likes and interests. If you feel the need to judge my literary tattoos, kindly go suck a fuck.

zero waste/wing

2011-03-14T12:40:00.001-05:00

(ebay'd harputs swacket, ideeen nyc blouse, thrifted sheer oversized blouse, thrifted bag, thrifted shiny leggings, ebay'd ann d boots)

Wore this to the Zero Waste fashion exhibit at Columbia College...yes, believe it or not, Chicago can haz thought-provoking fashion shows. Zero Waste presents the idea that fashion is not about seasons! and trends!, but is rather about timeless design that needn't lose its beauty with the changing months. Thus, I chose to wear an outfit comprised almost completely of second-hand garments. The exhibit addresses some of the problems inherent with fashion today (arbitrary cyclical trends, impossible beauty standards, the idea of "fast fashion", the ways in which fashion is privileged) that it really deserves it own well thought-out post. I'll write this post as soon as I am able (life has been quite busy) because the exhibit really deserves a quiet time reflect on its meaning. Soon.

she danced herself out of the womb

2011-03-11T22:19:00.001-06:00

My beautiful, sexy, and always inspiring friend Morgan. She's always impeccably dressed, whether it's for a night of dancing, discussing sex-positive feminism while getting drunk at Club Foot, or for grabbing a quick lunch as seen here. Love you grrrl.

2011-03-10T19:52:00.000-06:00

Inspired by Meg's recent tweets about OFFICEPUPPY, I've decided to introduce you all to my bundle of joy. Meet Booboo! Named after Snooki's nickname for JWOWW, no joke ya'll. She's a year-old tiny Chihuahua and was rescued after being abandoned in an alley during one of Chicago's coldest winter nights. Had our friend not found her, she most certainly would have died in the -20 degree cold. My boyfriend and I are thrilled to give her a forever, loving home and she is the light of our lives. Booboo enjoys chewing on squeaky toys, half-sleeping in our laps, and chasing a laser pointer with more fervor than the most spastic cat.

carven out a spot in my heart heyo!

2011-03-05T13:57:00.019-06:00

I've been feeling a bit of dissonance with my style lately. I find myself gravitating more towards bookish, nerdy cuts and silhouettes, probably because I am bookish and nerdy at heart. Yet I still can't give up the monochrome draped garments in my closet that provide a sort of shield against the normality that I fiercely loathe. I've been wondering, how do I reconcile my desire to wear prints, plaid, and pleats with my go-to spooky gothy wardrobe?

Quite easily, it turns out. Carven's Fall 2011 collection bridges these subcultural gaps easily and effortlessly, in a refined gesture towards blurring the lines of style genres. Nerdy? Check. Fashion goth? Check. Office wear? Yup, that's there too. Basically, this entire collection is exactly representational of my style (and life) - the peripheral awkward kid who sits alone at lunch, but secretly wants to hang out with the cool "alternative" bunch. It's very refreshing to know that I needn't pigeonhole myself into one style genre - I am free to explore all sides of my personality through what I wear.

Suffice it to say, I want almost every single piece in this collection.

Full skirt with deep pleats and severe jacket pockets elevate this look into aspirational nerd-girl wear.

Black and blue! Platform loafers! It's like Carven put me to sleep, went into my dreams, and extracted my style just like in Inception.

THIS FUCKING OUTFIT. If anything was made for me, this would be it. Definitely on my must-have list for fall. For my entire life, really. The combination of the asymmetrical draped tee and the deep blue structured skirt is just TOO PERFECT. A brilliant pairing of avant-garde with avant-nerd.

A Vivienne Westwood-inspired print with a Rodarte Spring 2011 silhouette, all good things in my opinion, combine to create a standout dress.

Draped tops and simple skirts ALL AUTUMN LONG.

MAJOR COLLAR ACTION right here.

Cool-girl party wear that fulfills my need to go to goth bars and sway haphazardly to The Cure. Or whichever of the same 20 songs that tends to be played at such places. A typical goth bar playlist includes Blue Monday (the version by Orgy), Dominion/Mother Russia, the incredibly misogynistic This Shit Will Fuck You Up, and that awful EBM remix of Send Me an Angel.

#lifewithsocialanxiety

2011-03-04T22:11:00.007-06:00

So last Thursday I attended the Cynthia Rowley trunk show at her boutique in Wicker Park. It was hosted by the ever-effervescent Amy Creyer of Chicago Streetstyle. I was really excited to be invited, because believe it or not, it was my first ~invite to anything ~kewl and ~fashion-related as a blogger. A bit of an ego boost, I guess. Unfortunately I suffer from cripping social anxiety, and when my boyfriend said he had band practice that night, I was thrust into a near-panic attack at the prospect of going alone. Schoomzing? Terrifying. People I don't know? RUN AWAY! But luckily I did not have a panic attack at the party, I managed to mingle and make small talk and do normal social things that most well-adjusted people take for granted.

Admittedly, I had never paid much attention to Cynthia Rowley's designs before this party. I assumed she made safe clothes for trixies who like khaki pants and Tory Burch and who never quite grew out of their college sorority style. Booooooy was I wrong! I saw fur, monochrome colors, avant-garde details, and imaginative prints, basically many things that would fit right at home in my closet. In fact, I even bought a gorgeous last-season dress for about 80% off, to be featured in an upcoming post. I've certainly learned my lesson against pre-judging!

The party was packed, but I only took photos of clothes. Going to the event alone without having a panic attack is enough of a breakthrough for me. I didn't need to add to my anxiety by asking to take photos of complete strangers "for my blog".

Runway pieces from her Spring collection.

I really should have bought one of these adorable little Coraline-meets-Kidrobot keychains, but I figured that I'd lose it because that's what seems to happen to all of my cute keychains ;___; First world problems.

Here's Amy, who hosted the party and was kind enough to invite me. You should probably check out her website. Sorry this photo isn't in focus.

Here's what I wore to the party. NOT WEARING BLACK!!OMGBBQ!! The entire outfit was built around my wicked Prada eyebrow glasses which I am still in shock that I even own. I was going for a Secretary (the movie) look, straight-laced yet with a subtle BDSM undertone. Top and skirt are American Apparel, bra is Wang. My Zana Bayne harness is so useful for injecting some fetish into an everyday outfit. Most normals would never make the connection between this harness and my status as a sub, but those who are practicing fetishists would recognize it instantly. Thus, I find that when I wear it, I end up meeting people with similar interests to my own.

My new (used and eBay'd) Comme des Garcons shoes. I finally have a pair of summertime shoes. I was initially hesitant to buy them because I worried that they would make my short stubby legs look even shorter, but my friends convinced me to not give a fuck about beauty standards. It's something I preach to other women, but often have trouble practicing myself. This doesn't make me a hypocrite...it makes me human. It's a tough world in which to be a woman.