teardrops on my pillow

Rock hasn't been kind to music that is unabashedly girly; at best, all-female bands are sequestered into the vapid made-up genre of "girl bands" (PLEASE read this Pitchfork article!), at worst, they are fetishized and endure all sorts of vile harassment (a fact made all too clear the last time I saw Austra - some bro pushed me out of the way and declared loudly to his buddy, "OH MAN, SHE'S SO FUCKING HOT!"). For lack of better words, The Dum Dum Girls seem to not give a fuck! This is band that owns their femininity, takes active joy in conventional girliness, and doesn't apologize for it. And perhaps most importantly, their music does not suffer for it.

There's a very tangible sense of longing that pervades their new album Only In Dreams; the feeling of grasping at something forever out of reach, that proverbial dangling carrot feeling. In DeeDee's case, this album was written while she dealt with the death of her mother (who, incidentally, is the woman on the cover of I Will Be) and her heartache is both wrenching and endearing. The titular "Wasted Away" actually made me misty as I listened to the lyrics that spoke so honestly of loss: "I'd rather waste away than see you only in dreams." As someone who's luckily never experienced the death of someone close, I can't relate at all to DeeDee's words but she makes me feel them as strongly as she does. "In My Head" features her desperately just wanting to be adored, something even Ian Brown couldn't even accomplish, though that universal human desire is buried deep in all of us. As in life, there's no eventual resolution to DeeDee's sense of yearning but this album leaves you smiling from its bubblegum pop sensibilities nonetheless.

Anyway, the vinyl edition of this album brings all of the music's moods into distinctly beautiful physicality. Ghosts, roses, and lace are a hint of the album's loss themes. But it's the pink marbled vinyl itself that struck me immediately, I mean, look at how gorgeous it is! It's easily the most beautiful piece of vinyl in my collection and I will treasure it every time it gets spun on my record player.


i want to be dependable, courageous, and good.

Some really special things have entered my life recently. I'm currently in the middle of redefining my whole aesthetic and it feels so good to have finally figured out how I want to dress. It's like a style switch clicked on in my brain! I'll have to write about it later, but for now, enjoy some eye candy.

Dries van Noten shoes from last season. A flash of rainbow caught my eye as I wandered through the miasma of shoes at Nordstrom Rack, and my heart skipped a beat when I saw these steeply discounted shoes in exactly my size. The heels and ankle straps collect light and refract it into an ocean of brilliant colors that change with every step I take. They are space-age, they are ethereal, and I'm in love.

Risto lightning skirt from his Spring 2010 collection. A lucky score on eBay, though it fits a little snug. I've gained some weight over the past year and truthfully I'm not insecure about it, but it does present some challenges when I can't predict my size anymore. Body politics are so sensitive and loaded with personal feelings, but it's important to talk honestly about these issues if we're ever to resolve them.

Zara button-down which I'm sure will be on every style blog in the coming weeks, but it's easy to see why! This blouse is an explosion of flowers and is precisely the kind of thing to wear when you're having a bad day. You can't be too upset when you're basically wearing the Secret Garden.

My latest haul from Quimby's.  I haven't finished reading Persepolis (a recommendation from my wonderful BFF), but it's shaping up to be one of my favorite books of all time. Well, actually it's a graphic novel, but its powerful storytelling transcends any literary medium. And the new Encens is a restrospective of Japanese fashion designers like Junya, Rei, and Jun and is basically one of the most glorious things ever. Highly required for any fans of wabi-sabi and drop crotch pants!


last chance for romance

(meadham kirchhoff for topshop dress (ebay), rodarte for opening ceremony cardigan, zana bayne harness, old shredded tights, even older UO boots)

Wow, I look completely asleep in this photo, which is surprisingly because this photo was taken on the one day when I was actually "running errands" and "taking care of business". In fact, I was so awake that I decided to wear my sparkliest dress around Wicker Park. It's an impeccable study of melting sequins and decaying hemlines and nonchalant sheerness; this dress looks like the zombie corpse of a disco ball. It attracts stares and glances like nothing else in my closet. Indeed, it's a prime example of how getting dressed each day is my biggest weapon against my social anxiety - when my outfit makes me happy, I can't help but shrug off any awkward looks I receive on the street. This is me, and I'm not apologizing for it anymore!

In my opinion this dress is best worn with my Rodarte for Opening Ceremony carpet cardigan and boots that are too old to function as boots...

Detailing so exquisite it could make you cry.

Thanks to everyone who entered the Lula magazine giveaway!  The winner is Stephanie Marie, congratulations! You all are so precious, I wish everyone could have won.



(american apparel sheer mesh longsleeve, CHREE dress gift from christine rhee, ann demeulemeester boots, red leather pendant gift from zana)

Wore this last week to Shimmer, which is a monthly shoegaze night at Late Bar hosted by the always-inspiring Scary Lady Sarah. Usually I wear something ultra dreamy to Shimmer but the urge hit me to wear something a bit more Puritan. This outfit would be SO perfect with the white scalloped Louis Vuitton collar that I've been dreaming of...


Scary Lady Sarah and Philly Peroxide always manage to dig up the most obscure shoegaze bands and expose them to a wider audience at this party. At Shimmer I always hear a song by an artist I've never heard of before and this time it was The Stargazer Lilies. Their brand of shoegaze is decidedly among the more disorienting, spacey variety...music for astral projections and swimming through poppy fields. RIYL All Natural Lemon & Lime Flavors or SIANspheric.

Pretty sure I need to start taking style cues from Shimmer's decorations...

Late Bar's projector is perfect for shoegazey self-portraits. I JUST WANT TO FEEL ETHEREAL.


(to stand in the shadow of your heart)

(thrifted dolce & gabbana jacket, rodarte x opening ceremony cardigan, john's a place to bury strangers t-shirt, risto leggings, ebay'd ann demeulemeester boots. THIS MAH SRS FACE)

Oh hey guys, let's check out the righteous spot on my lens! I was far too lazy/busy/unconcerned to retake these photos, so imperfection will have to suffice for today. Deal with it. As the Earth's axis causes the seasons to change, I've been wearing variations on this outfit for my more casual days. I love how wearing a jacket over my Rodarte x Opening Ceremony cardigan makes it look like I'm wearing some kind of 70s shag carpet around my neck.
Noise rock band t-shirt + dust on my lens is SO FASHIN, U GUYZ.

Behind me you may notice our Loveless mini-shrine. Last week was the 20th anniversary of My Bloody Valentine's Loveless, so perhaps this an appropriate moment to show it off. As Stereogum noted, Loveless is largely "responsible for the warped nature of a large chunk of your record collection". It's so rare that music comes along that sounds as monumentally transcendental today as it did when it first released; nothing sounds like Loveless though many bands have tried. It's brilliance is  perhaps best felt in its widespread legacy, nowadays it is nearly impossible to listen to guitar rock without noting at least some influence from this seminal album.
Our Lady of Guadalupe candle, John's Fender Princeton reverb amp (which he bought from some dude for next nothing, but apparently it's a Storage Wars "wow factor" situation!?), Loveless on vinyl, 33 1/3 Loveless mini-book, Julie West and Kidrobot Dunny (series 4) vinyl toys, Tremolo EP, Gloomy Bear vinyl toy, MBV ticket stub from the 2008 reunion tour.

It's far too easy to say that this was the best show I've ever been to. This was a fully sensory experience that can only be understood if one was there, caught up in the moment, bathed in sonorous waves of sound that bounced off the glittering nighttime sky of the Aragon. Kevin Shields' guitars just completely enveloped me and took me to a place not of this world - indeed, to see My Bloody Valentine live is to escape the planet Earth for an hour. I'd always lamented being born too late to have seen my favorite shoegaze bands in their heyday, but being able to catch their reunion tour is one of my most treasured life experiences.


giveaway! lula #13!

Most of the time, I feel like this blog is silly and pointless and am constantly in awe that people actually read it. As a way to say thanks, I'm having a giveaway for Lula #13! I've waxed poetic about Lula before but really, if you aren't familiar with her, I do strongly advise entering the giveaway. This is the current Fall/Winter 2011 issue of Lula and features lots of Miu Miu and Kate Moss. As always, my giveaways do not require any obligation of any kind of your part. Simply comment with a valid email address and I'll choose a winner at random on November 16th!

This magazine was purchased from Quimby's Books here in Chicago, so your magazine comes from a local indepedent bookstore. Good luck!


"i challenge you to a slow smile contest"

I know what you’re thinking. I can see it on your faces, from across the Internet.

I know, I’m pretty alarmed too.
But really! Sometimes I leave my house! These days I spend my few passing social moments at Late Bar, but a couple nights ago I actually emerged from my cave to go to a mixer at Tribute (is that right? “Networking event”? “Get-to-know party”? Fuck, I’m so clueless about these things) sponsored by the Chicago Blogger Network, which I’m sure you’ll be hearing more about soon. Tyler was gracious enough to take these charming Wednesdday Addams photos of me as proof that I did, in fact, vacate my couch long enough to socialize with other human beings. But I certainly made it home in time to catch the premiere of “The Fabric of the Cosmos”, which gave me a nerd boner pants tent.

(rodarte x opening ceremony jacket and dress, theory faux fur collar from ebay, chloe sevigny x opening ceremony paisley tights, rodarte shoes)

 Channeling Herman Cain's SLOOOOOOW SMILE.